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» Vandalism


from a previous QOTW

Best Ever Graffitti
On the wall of a foul smelling bog in Kings Cross station was the epithet,
"I'm 9 inches long and 4" round"
Somebody had added with hilarious results,
"are you a ferret?"
Pure class.
(Thu 7th Oct 2010, 16:49, More)

» Phobias

'' givs m th hbi-jbis
Th lttr ''.

I sriously cannot bar th lttr ''.

It maks m go all swaty and I fl quit qur.

No-on blivs m, but it's tru.

Fortunatly I had alrady mad my b3ta usrnam bfor I bcam afflictd.

Unfortunatly my Fathr's nam is Drk, my Mothr's nam is iln and my Brothr's nam is Stv.
(Fri 11th Apr 2008, 11:55, More)

» Have you ever seen a dead body?

Lady in the Water
Saw a dead body face-down in the local docks.

When I first saw her I thought she was wearing a nice mauve cardigan, very similar to this,

cgi.ebay.com/FIRST-ISSUE-Claiborne-Mauve-Cardigan-Sweater-PLUS-20W_W0QQitemZ310026161214QQihZ021QQcategoryZ63866QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

but with long sleeves.

Turns out she was naked and it wasn't a cardigan.

An elderly couple came over and after a few minutes of staring at the bloated, bluey-pink, bobbing body said, "Do you think she's dead?".

I replied, "No, just snorkelling".
(Thu 28th Feb 2008, 11:23, More)

» Sacked II

Trefynwy isn't the most exciting
town to live in, especially as a teenager. I had a Saturday job in the local opticians, making the tea and ensuring all the specs on the stands were nice and clean.
In a drawer amongst all the glasses that were due to be picked up I found a smaller case, and opening it found very posh looking monocle. Obviously this would raise a laugh that night at the pub, so I 'borrowed' it.
Unfortunately not only did the manager see me in the pub wearing stolen goods, but I lost the bloody thing on the way home.
To cut a long story short - I was sacked for eyepiece in Monmouth.
(Thu 29th May 2014, 16:44, More)

» Presents

It was a few years ago...
When the kids wake up on Christmas morning we have a tradition of firstly giving them a small stocking filled with inexpensive nick-nacks that they open whilst sat on our bed. Once they have opened the dozen or so small packages we then go downstairs for the big boxes and expensive stuff.

wavy lines thingy .....

It was Christmas morning quite a few years ago, our son was 4 our daughter 2 and a half, and they were sat on the end of the bed with their little stockings, very very excited. It took about half an hour for them to open their presents, felt tip pens, yoyo's, Thomas the tank engine / Teletubbies pants and socks etc, total value about 15.

I was recording everything so we could show the grand parents later that day. Once they had finished opening, they carefully put everything back in their stockings and went and started drawing christmas pictures in their bedrooms. That was it. As far as they were concerned that was Christmas done, and they were over the moon with what they had. Completely unaware of the overpriced and over-hyped boxes and boxes of stuff downstairs under the tree.

I still watch the video now when I need cheering up.
(Fri 27th Nov 2009, 13:57, More)
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