You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Post a new message | View older messages | Popular | Search

Hello me little darlings...
still here i see...
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 22:26, Reply)
Alright Frank

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 22:27, Reply)
alright windy

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 22:28, Reply)
You alright?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 22:34, Reply)
I am grand thanks
not frank though
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 22:54, Reply)
Course you are.
God let you out of the sandbox, and you're keeping a low profile. I understand.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 23:12, Reply)
I promise you i am not frank

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 23:13, Reply)
I miss frank

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 23:20, Reply)

Me too
(, Thu 14 Dec 2017, 0:11, Reply)
Always.
Watching
and judging.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 22:35, Reply)
Alright Scott,

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 22:44, Reply)
Show of hands please... Who is ready?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 18:28, Reply)
I haven't even bought my present yet , I'm not giving myself cash again

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 18:35, Reply)
Do you wrap it, also?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 18:36, Reply)
If I buy myself a present I expect it wrapped , cash I just transfer

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 18:37, Reply)
We all know it will be a watch

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 18:36, Reply)
No spoilers

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 18:37, Reply)
Know anything about sime format boilers? Mine's chucking a red light and not getting hot.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 20:18, Reply)
nvm fixed it.
I think there might have been a power cut (cable box was on) and it needed resetting (which it seems isn't the same as a simple power cyle).
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 21:02, Reply)
Hth

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 21:23, Reply)
Checked me router - uptime 3 hours so it probably got chopped around the time it's programmed to come on.
Would've probably solved it quicker but the previous occupant bust the selector knob and I had to pinch the spindle as me pliers are in aberdeen.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 21:39, Reply)
Lol knob

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 21:42, Reply)
I KNOW YOU ARE!!

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 21:55, Reply)
Yes m8, douched and lubed xx

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 18:55, Reply)
I'm completely ready.
And by 'ready' I mean 'drunk'.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 19:31, Reply)
When I was a kid doctors had a crystal decanter of booze on their desk , and an ashtray, might come back after brexit

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 19:39, Reply)
:(

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 19:39, Reply)
Such a bully, I've gazzed spacefish about it

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 19:40, Reply)
hopefully spacefish will do what manolith clearly won't
Seems the 'gay mafia' really is 'a thing'
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 21:10, Reply)
Poor spacefish :(

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 21:23, Reply)
:(

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 21:43, Reply)
Hold up I'll post a link to the spreadsheet

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 20:17, Reply)
Christmas radio in the workshop,
Tinsel and Christmas lights are up, Santa hat on the drill press. I think I'm finally ready for christmas guys! ❄☃⛄⛇☃❄⛇🍾🍾
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:12, Reply)
rub it in, why don't you

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:16, Reply)
You'll get there champ.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:31, Reply)
I'm just not ready, why aren't I ready?
:((((((
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:48, Reply)
Dunno.
The apprentice had just left early to go to the sex clinic place because he' says he's got a "fizzy knob".
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:52, Reply)
it'll be lemon-aids, probably

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:00, Reply)
Thanks doc

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:01, Reply)
wanks cock, more like

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:24, Reply)
I bet!

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:27, Reply)
it certainly makes *mine* fizzy

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:30, Reply)
*gets busy*

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:34, Reply)
probably got knob rot off a tart in Cowley

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:03, Reply)
Bill presents a range of activities, games and days out suitable for bored children trapped in a well

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:37, Reply)
What's that, Skippy? We're out of tiddlywinks?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:40, Reply)
I'm pretty sure I've binned my el cheapo felt Santa hat by now.
Is that a Christmas champagne icon you've got there?

I appear to have become a reindeer. Noice.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:21, Reply)
Double nice

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:32, Reply)
what sort of weird green champagne do you drink?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:41, Reply)
The bottle's green, you pillock, not the contents.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:43, Reply)
I thought you meant a flute.
Shove it up your flute.

It looks nothing like a bottle of champers, dear.
Unless you're about to crack it off someones head...
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:02, Reply)
There s something wrong with you.
There are champagne emoji in my post.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:04, Reply)
Ohhhhhh... (vienna)
I see it now. I thought we were on about the tree icons.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:17, Reply)
Champagne bottles are green no?
or are you colour blind as well as deaf?
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:45, Reply)
fucking hell Jason

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:59, Reply)

do you drink are you

©2014 UsVsTh3m
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:07, Reply)
:(

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:19, Reply)
sweet dreams Rob et alia
may you live on through the swear clock and clickbait robot
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:22, Reply)
I've just got my son a Swatch body and soul , that's a bit ready for Christmas

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:31, Reply)
Well done mate. Chrimbo is the best

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:31, Reply)
he wanted money

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:34, Reply)
He can lump it, I've already had to buy him a mobile phone this month, now my daughter wants a new one too , ponces

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:39, Reply)
who'se fault is it that there are two of them?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:42, Reply)
I'll stick with blaming the jews

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:49, Reply)
I bet the jews are ready for christmas

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:53, Reply)
They've already started theirs.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:55, Reply)
typical

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:59, Reply)

Marijuanukkah
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:02, Reply)
Probably got all the good stuff tucked away already

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:02, Reply)
you know what they're like

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:19, Reply)
shylocks

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:22, Reply)
They're off to Jerusalem. The capital of Israel
to celebrate a mixed gathering of invisible deities
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:03, Reply)
have a festive poo

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:41, Reply)
Done and done

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:45, Reply)
Another person ready for Christmas
Is this lady. Unless she's switched to celebrating Kwanzaa as well.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:41, Reply)
no thanks.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:48, Reply)
The important question here is has she done any porn

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:55, Reply)
BBWWUTBW?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:00, Reply)
"And here’s Adam as her new self, something she’s referred to as a “black” woman:"
Savage.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:55, Reply)
As a strong independent black woman I find this offensive

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 16:46, Reply)
If I went to my GP and said I self-identified as a unicorn could I get a horn surgically implanted on my forehead funded by the NHS?
It's essential for my mental wellbeing.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 17:14, Reply)
I'll show you "parity of esteem".

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 17:19, Reply)
IBYW

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 17:20, Reply)
Hope there's a light-up effigy of your good self to top the tree.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 17:20, Reply)

christmas.symbolics-dk.com/small/200/thumbnail/ANd9GcQuRz5dS8iu267-w9N-EIZcxI0I3gN6X3hm6fNO9Oe3IeLEv_REyQ.jpg
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 17:23, Reply)
alright

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:01, Reply)
hiya

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:06, Reply)
But we are young, we run green
Keep our teeth nice and clean
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:08, Reply)
I have you on ignore

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:16, Reply)
Are you ready for a brand-new beat?
Early-afternoon thread. Air your grievances, trumpet your triumphs and make coffee for your colleagues to show you care.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:53, Reply)
no, soz

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:03, Reply)
Bwoy don't vex me nuh.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:15, Reply)
Already got my coffee
Tree day today
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:16, Reply)
The office at the end of the road just coming out of the business park has got its tree up.
#blayzeit.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:21, Reply)
busy in sainsbury's just now
seems a lot of people are still getting ready for christmas
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:21, Reply)
They've missed out on the opportunity to run a Sainsbo Chrimbo campaign.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:22, Reply)
I envy them :(

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:25, Reply)
I might leave all my ready for Christmas till the 24th

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:27, Reply)
Be sure to tell us when you're ready.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:00, Reply)
I might forget

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:40, Reply)
more's the pity

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:29, Reply)
I've fallen victim to the annual office man-flu.
Horrid, diseased bastards.
Beechams on the go...
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:49, Reply)

-flu

Smack my Beechams up.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:54, Reply)
It's staff coffee afternoon here in just over an hour
"You are invited to Christmas afternoon tea on Wednesday 13th December, 4pm.

Free drinks will be served, along with mince pies, stollen and Christmas cake. Vegan and gluten-free options will be available."
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:50, Reply)
Just give me the money, thanks

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:52, Reply)
They do do a tasty mince pie
and the stolen should be up to scratch
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:08, Reply)
Every once in a while, some bright spark organised a carol service in this office.
Fortunately, no one will own up to playing any sort of instrument, any more, so the tradition looks to have died off.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:55, Reply)
Coffee afternoon =/ free drinks, surely
Gluten-free stollen...is that not just raisin-studded cardboard?
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:57, Reply)
It'll look like someone's swatted flies with a box

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:09, Reply)
Call it a Christmas Chameleon Party.
It's all about the marketing.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:29, Reply)
You come and go

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:45, Reply)
what's the vegan option?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:58, Reply)
Not attending

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:00, Reply)
Leaving such an appalling place

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:00, Reply)
Vitamin tablets and makeup to stop you looking so pale

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:07, Reply)
being smug

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:10, Reply)
Letting everyone know you are vegan

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:11, Reply)
sticking a broccoli up your shit chute

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:12, Reply)
I've eaten a salad once.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:28, Reply)
Soggy cracker

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:39, Reply)
hi guy's

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 15:13, Reply)
Drinks are free but the food is chargeable?
Thanks for all your hard work this past year, you cunts.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:06, Reply)
The serious solution is clearly to stuff yourself stupid in the staff canteen at lunchtime
then drink for free until your ears fall off.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:07, Reply)
It's all free!*
*one per employee
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:10, Reply)
took a few drafts for George Michael to finally get lyrics with more popular appeal

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:58, Reply)
I was ready a little while ago, but didn't want it to seem like I was showing off.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:12, Reply)
Sounds like a bit of a humble brag there
You fucking show off
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:20, Reply)
wiggle it just a little bit

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:20, Reply)
Have you gone off the boil since then, dear?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:39, Reply)
Smallest bread roll I've ever had
imgur.com/a/q8cgE
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 14:42, Reply)
Everybody ready for chrimble-wimble-bimbly-bobs??
*squee*
#12MoreSleeps
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:30, Reply)
Always

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:31, Reply)
Cheers

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:29, Reply)
Alright Jaysu...wait a minute.
Cancelled tonight because there were going to be only five of us and one of the other guys going is a complete knob jockey. No tickets to Star Wars left for tonight though, so I'm going tomorrow.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:34, Reply)
Not yet.
Starting to get a bit worried about this now.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:35, Reply)
Still not ready..?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:37, Reply)
no :(

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:52, Reply)
We're all here for you if there's anything we can do to assist your getting ready for christmasness

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:56, Reply)
COME OOOOOON!
IT'S ccccCCCCCCCCCHRRRISSSMUUUUSSSSSSS!!!!
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:56, Reply)
I *want* to be ready, I really do :(

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:04, Reply)
push harder

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:05, Reply)

🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶🎅 🤶
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:00, Reply)
Sure am buddy
I'm so excited I could literally blast excreta out of my anus
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:36, Reply)
I'm so excited, I could worship a palestinian jew!

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:41, Reply)
You know, I think I am... Almost.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:36, Reply)
Wait, what?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:38, Reply)
This week, I've watched Elf, Jingle All The Way, and The Nightmare Before Christmas.
Only one of which I'd seen before.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:40, Reply)
Elf, or the annual reminder that Zooey Deschanel has a weird face

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:50, Reply)
Don't think I've seen her in anything else.
She's sort of elfin, I suppose.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:53, Reply)
I've never seen her in anything.
Most of her films seem to be chick-flicks, though.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:01, Reply)
Was she Trillian in that god awful attempt at making Hitchhikers Guide into a film?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:08, Reply)
Apparently she was in it in some capacity
but since I haven't seen that either, I can't really comment.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:08, Reply)
It was not good.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:18, Reply)
My little bro worked on that
left the film business shortly after, true story
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:36, Reply)
Smart move, there's no future in movies.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:41, Reply)
Y

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:16, Reply)
Ta

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:26, Reply)
Her sister is good in that show about dead people with the guy who played the vampire in the one with Sarah Michelle Gellar

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:36, Reply)
She's also in the animated talky horse thing which I mean to watch

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:41, Reply)
Thought this was about Mr Ed, for a moment.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:44, Reply)
I watched one of the star wars films that the nerds don't like on Sunday
it was alright, all pew-pew and vrrm-vrrrm lightsabers and that
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:54, Reply)
Probably Revenge Of The Sith.
That at least has the saving grace of lots of sword fights.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:06, Reply)
Is it one the one with an annoying animal or the one where they just go on about trade pacts

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:07, Reply)
Attack of the Clones is the worst.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:24, Reply)
No m8

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:30, Reply)
Aside from Ian McDiarmid having an obviously wonderful time, there's precious little to recommend about any of the prequel trilogy.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:35, Reply)
Not even Ewan's "comedy" accent?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:45, Reply)
Watching a lot of talented performers completely falling at their craft is just sad.
At least McDiarmid seems to know it's crap and hams it up accordingly.
See also: Raoul Julia's performance in Street Fighter.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:50, Reply)
He's said it himself.
He talked about how much fun it was to play a character with no depth at all and who was just plain evil.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:23, Reply)
What a terrible role to bow out on.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:37, Reply)
I'm playing all the reindeer games

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:42, Reply)
I liked that film.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:47, Reply)
Tom Clancy's less succesful etc. etc.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:49, Reply)
fully torqued in my underpants thinking about it

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:59, Reply)
I'm going to stay awake right through till chrimsy-wimsy-doodles

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:00, Reply)
Dunno what that is, soz

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:07, Reply)
It's got 3 wizards and star-baby, it's brilliant

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:10, Reply)
Alright soundtrack too
If you like a sing-along
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:17, Reply)
Super Furry Animals, I hope?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:23, Reply)
No, some obscure rap bullshit you'd like

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:30, Reply)
well then it's no wonder I'm not ready for Christmas

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:39, Reply)
^ doesn't give a fuck

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:30, Reply)
Glory Days by the 'Boss' Springsteen, I hope

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:30, Reply)
No kronney tho is there, nice to see the lovely Libby in the paper
www.newsshopper.co.uk/news/15725948.See_inside_the_Yacht_pub_in_Bexleyheath_after_its_massive_refurbishment/
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:38, Reply)
shame

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:41, Reply)
I see paki bill managed to get in a picture

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:44, Reply)
Deven needs to sort his hair out

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:46, Reply)
He's brand new , bit of a space cadet

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:47, Reply)
they've got rocking rudolph on tap though so they look as though they're ready for christmas

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:51, Reply)
They were ready in august

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:57, Reply)
I'll add them to the spreadsheet

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:59, Reply)
Greene King beer is awful.
Symps xox
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:59, Reply)
I don't drink beer so it doesn't bother me

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:03, Reply)
A girl called Rocky and a lad who looks like Giant Baby Ed Sheeran?
Nice.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:21, Reply)
Rochelle is her name but she likes rocky, she's alright, so far he's useless

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:29, Reply)
I bet you've glittered your knoblet

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:45, Reply)
I've pinned some holly to my fucken foreskin

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 11:47, Reply)
RIP Peter Kay

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:22, Reply)
Garlic dead?

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:25, Reply)
he's just cancelled his 2018/2019 tour and work projects

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:29, Reply)
I never liked him and I'm not gonna start now
/ac
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:45, Reply)
Phoenix Nights was fucking brilliant, I thought
Everything he's done since seems to suggest that this must be because of the other writers
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:01, Reply)
yes

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 13:29, Reply)
Good morning fellow netizens

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 7:51, Reply)

Good morning, fellow dotcomstituent.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 7:58, Reply)
Fuck off mate

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:09, Reply)
fom
mozers? :O
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:33, Reply)
morning

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:12, Reply)
Mind how you go, stalwart httplebian

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:13, Reply)
How do.
Hump day and all that jazz.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:05, Reply)
lovely humps

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:12, Reply)
Hello m8.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:09, Reply)
hiya

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:12, Reply)
I forgot to go and sort out someone's fire yesterday and now they're whinging

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:13, Reply)
^ twisted fire-not-putter-outer

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:15, Reply)
I was supposed to help light their gas fire

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:19, Reply)
^ twisted fire-not-starter

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:25, Reply)
Come on, Windy, light my fire.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:05, Reply)
So, it's fucked.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:08, Reply)
pour petrol on it

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:15, Reply)
Get McBeef to do one of his trademark 'pilot light' guffs.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:19, Reply)
torch their house

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:16, Reply)
Ok mate.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:19, Reply)
Cheers

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:26, Reply)
Light the fuckers up like a Christmas tree.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:20, Reply)
couldn't go to a Star Wars premiere for the first time in my life because of my fucking relatives
the ONE day this year I had reserved just for myself. this will NEVER happen again unless im somewhere in the jungles of Sumatra or strolling the Pampas

morning *calms down*

(edit) when I return home on friday night I shall start my regular all star wars movies marathon or next monday, depending on how needy i am. then I shall visit the cinema.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:23, Reply)
I can safely say you will make it for the next premiere

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:25, Reply)
I'm in two minds now.
It's premiering here tonight but I'm supposed to be seeing some friends for a drink. I'm tempted to sack off because technically only one of the people in the group is actually a friend. Might see if there are any tickets left for the late showing before making any sudden moves.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:27, Reply)
Watch them in the right order then - 4, 5, 2, 3, 6, then 7

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:15, Reply)
1,2,3, Christmas special, Jar Jar supercut, 3 again.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:21, Reply)
He went downhill after PiL

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:23, Reply)
Why would you take a break after Empire Strikes Back to watch the prequels?
And why have you missed out Rogue One?
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:34, Reply)
Well boil my sprouts
it's only 12 days to Christmas!

Morning all
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:37, Reply)
roast them with lardons

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:39, Reply)
^
Plenty of garlic butter as well...now there's lovely.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:40, Reply)

(actually, I've thinly sliced my sprouts and made a salad with beetroot and feta but don't tell anyone or else we'll get pulled up for food chat)
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:51, Reply)
I'm not sure I'm convinced by that.
Did you slice them, like, raw and everything?
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:08, Reply)
Raw as fuck

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 12:34, Reply)

day sleep
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:53, Reply)
and fellettes

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:37, Reply)
fellerific!

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:39, Reply)
gunt

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:39, Reply)
Maybe yours will catch on.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:41, Reply)
It's beginning to look a lot like are you ready for Christmas ? Every post you see

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:45, Reply)
I thought I was, but I'm not so sure now

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:49, Reply)
We need to tempt frank out of his sandbox, who's got some figgy pudding

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 8:51, Reply)
I heard he'd succumbed to psittacosis

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:14, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQ7KQLzVO9o
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:24, Reply)
hello citizens of the world wide web community

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:12, Reply)
*tips fedora*

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:19, Reply)
Everybody on the Internet is a nob.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:35, Reply)
bit netophobic

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:40, Reply)
take your hate offline

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:42, Reply)
Everyone offline is a nob, too.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:02, Reply)
you are a dicking dick prick, you cockdrip!
courtesy of www.swearify.co.uk/
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:43, Reply)
another great internet project

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:44, Reply)
fucking Good morning fellow fucking netizens, you bellend!

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:51, Reply)
:(

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:01, Reply)
Says the man posting on the internet.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:43, Reply)
in the land of the nobs, monster munch is a nob

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:52, Reply)
i think we should perform a netizen arrest

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:02, Reply)
A Buddhist policeman tips water up his nose
he is a fool
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:05, Reply)
You'll never take me alive.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:07, Reply)
ok

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:11, Reply)
Good morning fellow nearly christmas fans :) :) :) :)

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:53, Reply)
ventilators, more like

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:55, Reply)
Bent ill gayers, more like

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:56, Reply)
I'm standing outside Tescos singing Christmas carols all day

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:56, Reply)
nude btw

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 9:57, Reply)
I can see your mistletoe.

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:03, Reply)
Every little helps

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:04, Reply)
:)

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:05, Reply)
I'm taking money out of the bucket because I had to see that

(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 10:09, Reply)
Are you ready for Christmas?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:17, Reply)
Not really
Someone in my local area is selling some linn kans at a reasonable price. Some sticker marks on the wood.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:22, Reply)
No, blimey

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:34, Reply)
Not really.
Someone in my local area is selling some linn kans at a reasonable price. Some sticker marks on the wood.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:23, Reply)
Jokers

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:34, Reply)
Dunno

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:24, Reply)
Ok tell me later

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:35, Reply)
Not really
Someone in my local area is selling some linn kans at a reasonable price. Some sticker marks on the wood.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:27, Reply)
What? No

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:35, Reply)
Sure am buddy
I'm so excited I could literally shit out my cock
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:29, Reply)
Dearest b,
I wish I could be home, for Christmas

M

X
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:36, Reply)
I am now that I have a bottle of scotch and an erection

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:39, Reply)
Did one cause the other

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:42, Reply)
I don't think so

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:45, Reply)
I've never enjoyed a scotch in my life

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:51, Reply)
Bourbon drinker, hmm?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 20:54, Reply)
Jack Daniels is a date rape drug to me, nobody take advantage plz , eh .....

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 21:26, Reply)
Bit racist

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 20:55, Reply)
whisky basically falls into two categories
ones that make me go fucking hell that was horrible and ones that don't
Occasionally I enjoy ones from the latter, but I don't go out of my way to find them
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 21:32, Reply)
I've conceded that rum is much nicer than whisky.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 21:34, Reply)
does anyone know where I can get some linn kans for a reasonable price?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 21:26, Reply)
fuck you.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 21:30, Reply)
I don't mind if there are sticker marks on the wood

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 21:33, Reply)
DOB

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 21:38, Reply)
Not really.
Someone in my local area is selling some linn kans at a reasonable price. Some sticker marks on the wood.
(, Wed 13 Dec 2017, 6:39, Reply)
Been watching Windy shower.
What was the highlight of your day?
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 18:27, Reply)
Harassment, archived.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 18:31, Reply)
I actually haven't had a shower yet.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 18:38, Reply)
Eww, stinky.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:07, Reply)

Leading a meeting outlining the scope of a review of our operationalisation of FCA policy statement 17/3.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 18:51, Reply)
Fuck off mate

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 18:54, Reply)
You fucking chink

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:11, Reply)
Hahaha, you're well fucking shit.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 19:30, Reply)
climbing mount improbable

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 18:55, Reply)
Monkeys with tits

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 18:57, Reply)
How are you mate?
I'm home early. Might have a shower.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:43, Reply)
make sure you clean your biffins bridge

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:46, Reply)
Woah, wait. Is it safe to Google that?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:50, Reply)
yes

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:59, Reply)
make sure you clean your notcher

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:55, Reply)
make sure you clean your barse

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:56, Reply)
make sure you clean your gooch

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:57, Reply)

ooch unt
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:07, Reply)
going home now

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:59, Reply)
make sure you clean your taint

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:59, Reply)
Always have, always will

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:00, Reply)
fucking hell

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:02, Reply)
^upset

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:46, Reply)
Musn't grumble.
On the way home I had the nagging suspicion I had a rehearsal tonight but it turns out it's next Tuesday, so that's a result. Going to check if my new stylus works with my tablet now, and then a bit of cardio.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:59, Reply)
make sure you clean your durf

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:02, Reply)
You're just making it up at this stage.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:09, Reply)
am not

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:18, Reply)
no booze tonight and a vegetarian dinner
Bah humbug
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:00, Reply)
Gay

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:05, Reply)
y
My brother's not allowed to drive for a year. He is fucked in terms of work.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:06, Reply)
Just buy him one of those self-driving cars from the future.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:27, Reply)
Thanks doc! I mean 'Doc'

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:38, Reply)
Buses not an option?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:48, Reply)
turtle power

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:48, Reply)
make sure you wipe your pipe

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:33, Reply)
make sure you sponge your clunge

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:37, Reply)
make sure you swab your knob

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:38, Reply)
Make sure you buff your muff

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:39, Reply)
make sure you sluice your prepuce

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:40, Reply)
make sure you scrub your chub

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:41, Reply)
make sure you cillit bang your wang

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:53, Reply)
Paul Simon's really phoning it in, these days.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 18:03, Reply)
Not bad ,

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 17:49, Reply)
mid afternoon thread
What are the best and worst things to happen to you today?
You can't say this thread.
or "shut up Jaysums"

I'm tired. House next door decided to throw an alt 90's party last night.
Hits from Fatboy Slim and New Order...
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:53, Reply)
This thread

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:57, Reply)
This thread

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:58, Reply)
Hitler.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:59, Reply)
And what is the worst thing to happen to you?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:39, Reply)
This thread

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:45, Reply)
Sux 2 b u

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:50, Reply)
shut up Jaysums

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:59, Reply)
best thing so far
2 dvds i've been waiting for ave arrived and i'm off out tonight, plus my earache has FINALLY fucked off.
worst thing, housework
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:03, Reply)
More cheesy horrors?
Not your ears, obvs
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:14, Reply)
a new copy of demons
because it's so bad, i fucking love it.
also got super mario bros.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:18, Reply)
Super Mario Bros?
Oh dear, that is truly terrible.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:22, Reply)
i know!
it's great! utter fucking cheese
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:24, Reply)
Didn't Hoskins almost die filming it?
That would have been a shitty end to his life.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:37, Reply)
yeah, i think it was during a scene where he's in a bucket/hoist thing
his death would have been infamous
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:38, Reply)
Oh God... You meant the film...
Only good thing about that is the Roxette song
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:05, Reply)
Roxette, Super Furries, the soundtrack to the upcoming /talk b4sh is looking beezer!

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:18, Reply)
all topped off with a nice bit of beatboxing in the nude

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:38, Reply)
Today's been solidly unexciting so far.
Probably the best thing is that I got my train and plane tickets sorted out so I can see my dad over Chrimbo. The sun's also come out and it's a beautiful day.

On the downside, a combination of central heating and digestion is inexorably making me fall asleep at my desk, just the way it seems to happen every fucking day at the moment. Tedious.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:04, Reply)

The sun's I've
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:07, Reply)
That's old news, Ricky-baby.
Do keep up.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:12, Reply)
bet your bottom dollar

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:15, Reply)
lol, bottom

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:17, Reply)
Best - got an apple Danish to have post lunch
Worst - finding out I've lost 50k to a scammer :(
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:09, Reply)
Typical Ian.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:11, Reply)
Ian's are the worst

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:38, Reply)
apricot danish is the best

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:40, Reply)
Best thing: /talk xmas update threads
Worst thing: /talk non-xmas update threads
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:09, Reply)
I thought I was ready a minute ago, but it turned out to be trapped wind :(

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:13, Reply)
Hark! The mcbeef anal sing

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:15, Reply)
Glory to my puckered ring

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:19, Reply)
Good ring windyass pooped out

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:21, Reply)
on the chest of Stephen

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:24, Reply)
bender blow gay brown pants trout

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:37, Reply)
weeping fist cum wee-wee
shite wee bum turd poon twat shite

etc
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:44, Reply)
shut up m8

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:53, Reply)
^jel of my ski1llz

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:58, Reply)
This is jam hot

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:28, Reply)
On a scale of 'Krampus' to 'Santa Claus'
How ready are you?
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:16, Reply)
The best things in life are free,
Now that I've discovered what you mean to me
The best things in life are free,
Now that we've got each other
The best things in life are free
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:18, Reply)
apart from shoe, that's well expensive

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:19, Reply)
innit bruv

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:24, Reply)
Didn't get sacked.
Didn't get sacked.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:21, Reply)
Good news m8
Sorry to hear that m8
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:24, Reply)
Thank god I've still got an income.
Maybe this is the kick up the arse I need to do something positive with my life.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:27, Reply)
Go for it m8

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:31, Reply)
yes, mate! Now's the time to
find a stable income in an area of employment that you don't find fulfilling in any capacity
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:38, Reply)
Binmen are raking it in, and only a 7% chance of needlestick. Oh boy!

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:40, Reply)
nah you're thinking of gardeners
gardeners are raking it in m8
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:46, Reply)
Croupiers m8.
Croupiers are raking it in.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:55, Reply)
Alternative health practitioners m8
Alternative health practitioners are reiki-ing it in.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:57, Reply)
Have you been a naughty boy?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:30, Reply)
Accidentally undermining other people for the good of the company will never go down well with said middle manager

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:39, Reply)
Oh, well, as long as it was an accident, eh?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:34, Reply)
I was absolutely starving and then looked at the back of my drawer and found a cadburys boost!
Also went to hospital scan with my wife and the next baby is fine so that was good too.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:31, Reply)
you can get babies from next?
no wonder there's so many chavs with prams in there
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 14:47, Reply)
RIP Aharon Yehuda Leib Shteinman

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:02, Reply)
taken 2 soon :'(

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:20, Reply)
104, blimey

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:24, Reply)
That name is a dyslexics nemesis

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:28, Reply)
No that's nesemis

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:56, Reply)
You can't have a party without some Super Furry Animals tracks
YOU CAN'T
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:30, Reply)
I can

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:31, Reply)
Check again

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:38, Reply)
I can
 
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:57, Reply)
I can

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:34, Reply)
Check again

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:39, Reply)
I can

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:36, Reply)
Check again

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:39, Reply)
I can

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:39, Reply)
Check again

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:39, Reply)
check 'em

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:47, Reply)
i put it to you, good sir, that i can indeed have a party without such tracks

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:47, Reply)
Thou hath not seeneth the power of Play it Cool to a dancing emporiums floor
It doth fill with rapidity madam
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:50, Reply)
verily, by evening's end, come on, eileen produceth similar results
thus, your argument is flawed
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:00, Reply)
I having a party, right now.
You aren't invited.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:50, Reply)
I r baboon big star of cartoon

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:52, Reply)
^not weasel

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:05, Reply)

party + mid-life crisis
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:52, Reply)
I'll be 40 in a month and a half.
I thought middle age was 50, these days?
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:29, Reply)
Are you going to live to 100?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:41, Reply)
Live slow, and die a burden.
That's my motto.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:45, Reply)
It's my party and I'll skip the Super Furry Animals if I want to

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:58, Reply)
Can and have, on numerous occasions

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:01, Reply)
Well that response wasn't totally predictable

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:03, Reply)
fucking hell

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:07, Reply)
Here she is...

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:17, Reply)
RIP Giuseppe Toni Mascolo

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:28, Reply)
Shame, I liked him in Eastenders

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 16:37, Reply)
omg omg omg
now I'm ready for christmas
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:13, Reply)
O
M
G
*SQUUEEEE*

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:19, Reply)
ok who wants some figgy pudding?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:21, Reply)

y pudd
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:04, Reply)
I'm still not quite ready

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:22, Reply)
keep us posted yeah?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:25, Reply)
I'm checking every couple of minutes, hopefully it won't be too long now

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:27, Reply)
still nothing :(

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:32, Reply)
You've invested in Bitcoin for Christmas, haven't you?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:15, Reply)
I've incested in titgroin more like

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:22, Reply)
nice one, boyce

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:43, Reply)
we have one of these in the office yeah?
shop.moderntoss.com/christmas-1/seasonal-bollock-stick
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:05, Reply)
Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas
But I think I'll miss this one this year
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:31, Reply)
actually the best Christmas song is Stay Another Day

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:35, Reply)
It is in my top ten of songs about suicide for sure

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:38, Reply)
actually the best christmas song is fucken die hard

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:43, Reply)
yeah, in the boys' showers

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:45, Reply)
lol

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:05, Reply)
ffs it's 'Run Run Rudolph' by Chuck 'hooker's mouth' Berry and well you know it, young man

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:45, Reply)

(r b n m) x 2
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:06, Reply)
Fairytale of New York
That is all.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:15, Reply)
I like the Spice Girls version of that... Obviously.
I think my fave Christmas song is "A Spaceman Came Travelling", fact fans.
Please update spreadsheets accordingly
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:54, Reply)
shut up Jason

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:59, Reply)
I'm incredibly bored, Dickie

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:05, Reply)
me too m8

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:13, Reply)
I'm swinging my willy around

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:34, Reply)
festively?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:35, Reply)
no
nonchalantly
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:37, Reply)
like chipolata and a couple of cranberries

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:37, Reply)
ok

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:43, Reply)
alright Internet

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:46, Reply)
x

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:51, Reply)
But who else is ?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:50, Reply)
best have a show of hands I think

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:50, Reply)
hopefully we'll find out over the course of the next 12 days

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:52, Reply)
rob

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:00, Reply)
he's excited about the xmas dinner in the night shelter
Good old Crisis at Christmas
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:03, Reply)
Kunt's taking his ex and kid to Barbados apparently

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:05, Reply)
I'm an angel

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:58, Reply)
cool, what bike have you got

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:00, Reply)

this one
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:08, Reply)
no soz was busy searching for dykes,,,, eeerm, ... trikes

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:21, Reply)
lol

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:23, Reply)

www.oddee.com/wp-content/uploads/_media/imgs/articles2/a99417_936c3aa71.jpg
scout.cheatsheet.me/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/01616_l2EidPPcduT_600x450.jpg
img.xooimage.com/files110/2/b/7/10377082_64313978...498647_n-47f9616.jpg
picanimal.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/06/cats-basket-trike-funny-kitty-cart-rider-wallpaper-cat-download-1366x768.jpg
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:19, Reply)
ffs

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:21, Reply)
always xxx

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:00, Reply)
by the way, this is all due to a dm conversation i had with rob
don't let monster munch take any of the credit
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:03, Reply)
he's been bragging about how he's like bff's with rob and stuff, and how you're just a shit mod - and a wanker
you should deffo ban him m8
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:08, Reply)
might ban him on christmas day as a present to myself

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:14, Reply)
I had this gaz from him, which I assume he has sent to everyone:
manolith
On the advice of B3th (for what that's worth) I'm asking people to help get manolith sandboxed on /talk.

Apparently the best way to achieve this is to use the 'mail us' button on the B3ta homepage (button on the top right) and select 'Messageboard stuff: icons, donations & trolls'. This is the message I sent; feel free to copy & paste or to come up with your own message

manolith

He's really spoiling /talk.

Please could you sandbox him.

This isn't about using 'ignore' - he's constantly spoiling the place in a way that 'ignore' wouldn't deal with.

Thanks

[USERNAME}
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:14, Reply)
Good old MM

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:15, Reply)

b3ta.com/talk/8136226
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:16, Reply)
Who's B3th?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:21, Reply)
off topic mod, dead now
tangles' post is a c&p of a real gaz sent by a deeply troubled poster with anger problems and a napoleon complex.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:22, Reply)
I see.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:28, Reply)
He was rude about my dog when he came to Oxford.
And he drank 6 quid a pint lager and only got 1 round in.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:30, Reply)
mcbeef, you mean?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:41, Reply)
Mcbeef was a delight.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:43, Reply)
i'd like to meet this 'mcbeef'
there's a few of you i reckon i could stand to be around, actually.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:44, Reply)
You never wanted to meet me when I lived in Portsmouth.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:46, Reply)
did i even know you lived here?
also, i got burned pretty bad on the concept of pompey b3tans by baldmonkey
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:57, Reply)
Yeah. I wasn't even posting here when I lived there.
I keep saying I'll come visit TH, but haven't got round to it. If I do, we'll have a beer.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:00, Reply)
some baldmonkey burned your neck?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 15:37, Reply)
B4sh tiem :) :) :)
Lets get something in the calendar
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:48, Reply)
yessssss! sign me up

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:57, Reply)
What's he like now?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:46, Reply)
I prefer his wife if I'm honest.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:47, Reply)
We all seem to have married up.
This place would be a paradise if our spouses took over our accounts.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:50, Reply)
haha, really?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:33, Reply)
it was me

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:34, Reply)

you
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:43, Reply)
and people said that place was full of crybabies

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:41, Reply)
same fellow referred to here
b3ta.com/talk/7745189

This sparked a quite spectacular meltdown, one of the best ever
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:50, Reply)
It was excellent

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:51, Reply)
CRANLEEEEEYYYY

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:31, Reply)
why did you use [ and } and not {} and []

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:26, Reply)
I told him to do that, to annoy you

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:26, Reply)
orz

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:29, Reply)

frinkiac.com/video/S05E11/TwxYonx-P4jRCu5eS8g2NGaXoGA=.gif
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:30, Reply)
^has to supply his own knobs

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:33, Reply)
({°})

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:34, Reply)
cor!

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:51, Reply)
now that's a lol we can all agree on

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:32, Reply)
what a cunt
after everything i've done for him
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:32, Reply)
banning's too good for him

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:37, Reply)
oh I don't know

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:51, Reply)
I really thought we'd bonded over #ignoringdoubledeckers,
but obviously we were not meant to be.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:40, Reply)
not if you keep grassing me up, snitchy

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:45, Reply)
I think Occasional Dingbat Wednesdays was the end of us.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:47, Reply)
The true meaning of Christmas

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:46, Reply)
FUCK YEAH!!!!!

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:14, Reply)
+ AMERICUH

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:26, Reply)
If you fail, never give up because F.A.I.L means "First attempt at learning"
End is not the E.N.D, in fact it means "effort never dies"
If you get No as an answer remember N.O means Next opportunity.
POSITIVE THINKING
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:43, Reply)
You becoming a PUA?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:44, Reply)
Is this a sex pest thing?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:46, Reply)
but that means Piss Off Stupid Inspirational Thinking Is Very Emetic

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:47, Reply)
Yes

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:48, Reply)
Going for an HIV test? Think positive.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:47, Reply)
Maybe it's "First attempt IN learning"?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:52, Reply)
You know what, you might be right

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 12:53, Reply)
DEATH is just 'Did Everything Alright, Things Happen'. Next patient please.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:02, Reply)

God honors a beautiful blend of gift and grit! He gives the gift, and He expects us to have the grit to practice and learn how to use it effectively.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:04, Reply)
Blessed are the grifters.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:10, Reply)
also the commandos and the bombers

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:55, Reply)
Windy Almost Never Kisses Erotically, Really: Sad!

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:58, Reply)
RUDOLPH!

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:00, Reply)
fuck, tree :(

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:01, Reply)
As a doc you should know that that leads to bark in willy

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:28, Reply)
Free Frank

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:08, Reply)
God won't go back on his word

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:27, Reply)
God is a cunt

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:29, Reply)
true

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:33, Reply)
RIP on this day

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:44, Reply)
Me too!
Tree goes up tomorrow and tonight is family Christmas piss-up at spoons
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 13:14, Reply)
Is everyone ready for Christmas yet?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:01, Reply)
Yes!
Not really. Just pulling your leg.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:04, Reply)
Talking of legs
I found some black ice at a junction and now my leg is bleeding
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:07, Reply)
I learnt from yesterday's error
Today I was in full snow gear despite there being not so much of a frost where I live: sure enough our here in North Finchley there's still shitloads of snow and ice everywhere: I saw two people wipe out on my way up from the tube.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:09, Reply)
Was it a funny fall over or an ambulance required fall?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:16, Reply)
both were Mr Bean style slapstick falls rather than 'pensioner with cracked skull' dramas

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:23, Reply)
It's normally their hips that get cracked.
Well, the neck of the femur, but I think one goes into the other.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:27, Reply)
The hip bone's connected to the
thigh bone.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:36, Reply)
I'm just glad I fell over on my bicycle
a bit of road rash and I'm fine. If I'd been on the motorbike there would have been crunching and expensive damage.

There's a water leak on the road which wasn't a problem. What WAS a problem is the junction a few metres down the road where the water that had been taken by the car wheels going through the puddle has frozen. Not being a flat sheet you can't see how icy it is until you're hugging it.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:18, Reply)
Why must you make everything into a race issue?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:09, Reply)
Because I'm very competitive

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:14, Reply)
Despite extensive digging around yesterday, I can't find my slip-on crampons.
Luckily most of the snow's gone over here today so I didn't need them on the way in #thatsinteresting.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:11, Reply)

❄☃⛄⛇🌨⛇⛄☃❄☃⛄☃⛇☃⛇⛇⛇☃☃❄❄❄❄☃⛄⛇⛄☃☃⛄⛄☃☃❄❄❄❄❄❄❄🌨🌨🌨🌨🌨🌨🌨🌨🌨⛇🌨⛇🌨⛇🌨⛇🌨⛇🌨⛇⛄☃⛄⛇🌨🌨⛇⛄☃❄☃⛄⛇🌨🌨🌨⛄❄⛇⛄🌨☃❄🌨⛄☃☃☃☃☃☃❄❄❄❄❄❄⛇⛇⛇⛇⛇
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:05, Reply)
^ Walking in the air.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:06, Reply)
I'm high

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:16, Reply)
Chris who?
Might watch Zathura, later.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:07, Reply)
I might punch myself repeatedly in the bollocks, so much the same thing really

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:13, Reply)
Yeah, I'd probably enjoy watching that, too.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:18, Reply)
Thus spake Zathura?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:16, Reply)
2001 was alright, but it needed more CGI Dewbacks.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:23, Reply)
I can't believe they're bringing Jar Jar back.
Have they learnt nothing?
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:24, Reply)
whoa whoa I wasn't ready for the morning thread yet

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:24, Reply)
Being honest, it was a terrible thread

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:27, Reply)
not like this top class classic

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:52, Reply)
One for the ages

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:04, Reply)
might delolte

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:05, Reply)
you'll have to wait until tomorrow (morning) for the next one

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:27, Reply)
I have similar concerns about you and 'this jelly'

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:30, Reply)
it's possibly a little too bootylicious for me

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:04, Reply)
this is what I feared

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:09, Reply)
I can't tell

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:30, Reply)
I bet you are

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:32, Reply)
It's because we don't have our Christmas icons, yet.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:36, Reply)
i've asked. twice!
we are being forsaken by an angry god
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:46, Reply)
What, you can't just switch them on when you choose?
This is an outage.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:56, Reply)
And an outrage, too.
I've sent rob a tweet.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:00, Reply)
Nobody responds to your tweets

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:03, Reply)
It's exactly this defeatist attitude that is destroying this forum.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:05, Reply)
Well, this is a first.
twitter.com/robmanuel/status/940521679096295424?s=17
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:17, Reply)
hasn't he just passed it on to the person that manolith asked in the first place?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:46, Reply)
yes

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:08, Reply)
BROKEN BRITAIN
Still, somebody responding to one of my tweets is a minor Christmas miracle.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:45, Reply)
nah
it requires fiddling with the back end
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:44, Reply)
GS

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:47, Reply)
!

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:53, Reply)
Sure am buddy
I'm so excited I could literally excrete raw faecal matter
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:30, Reply)
YESSSSSSSSS

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:31, Reply)
um, it's actually the start of hannukkah today
so could you be a bit more culturally sensitive plz?
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:41, Reply)
eff off, yiddo

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:43, Reply)
You're in an exceptionally sour mood this morning, even for you.
Is everything alright at home?
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:54, Reply)
I'm fine thanks. This is me in good humour, I'm afraid

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:06, Reply)
mazel tov !

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:06, Reply)
Did you light your candle?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:14, Reply)
^sure hard to handle

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:23, Reply)
something about "yo mamma".

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:28, Reply)
Come on now... don't be silly.
We asked this yesterday
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:28, Reply)
and the day before
and the day before that
and the day before the day before that
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:40, Reply)
it's almost as if it's in the forefont of peoples minds!!
Madness
(Baggy trousers)
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:46, Reply)
It is funny because it is not funny

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 10:33, Reply)
Look at this miserable cunt
www.portsmouth.co.uk/our-region/hayling-island/tesco-delivers-a-ho-ho-no-to-charity-santa-1-8285948

McBeef, I mean
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:03, Reply)
Having now got my Christmas travel sorted,
I can confirm that I am, in fact, ready for Christmas.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:04, Reply)
Nice one, I'll update the spreadsheet

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 11:15, Reply)
Morning.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 7:39, Reply)
morning winders
it's currently snaining.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 7:47, Reply)
I'm back in to work.
Bit cold
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:01, Reply)
Alright dribble

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 7:55, Reply)
Fuck off mate

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:01, Reply)
End a gud morning to you.
Went back to the gym last night for the first time in over a month and there's definitely something fecked with my shoulder.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:04, Reply)
Just have it off

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:05, Reply)
Disgusting

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:10, Reply)
He'

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:16, Reply)
hey bae

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:07, Reply)
Cracking weather gromit

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:19, Reply)
Top work, Windows.
School's out, again.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:18, Reply)
Good stuff.
By not having been in yesterday I got away with not having to clear any snow or do any gritting.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:20, Reply)
Google maps shows my drive to work as being at least twice as long as usual, this morning,
so I'm doing my bit by staying off the roads.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:33, Reply)
just don't browse for porn while you're on a vpn

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:21, Reply)
#lifehacks

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:31, Reply)
Yah man

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:25, Reply)
I'm not being responsible for fucking Williams and JUMANJI chat. Sorry.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:57, Reply)
we're all sorry

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:00, Reply)
I've never seen JUMANJI
Or The Lion King.
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:03, Reply)


(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:42, Reply)
I do hope that's a non gender specific snowperson.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:44, Reply)
Well done, girls

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:48, Reply)
That chap is trying to sue the school.

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:58, Reply)

🌨
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:59, Reply)

❄☃❄☃❄☃🌊☃❄☃❄☃⛇⛇⛇⛇⛇⛄⛄⛄⛄⛄⛄⛇⛇⛇⛄⛇⛇⛄⛇⛇⛇⛄⛄⛄⛄⛄⛄☃☃☃☃☃❄❄❄❄
(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 8:59, Reply)
Icy crashy morning!

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:07, Reply)
turtle power

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 9:29, Reply)
morning

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 7:29, Reply)
Who will stomp your morning thread, today?

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 7:37, Reply)
On it

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 7:39, Reply)
Ragnarok Shirtlifter

(, Tue 12 Dec 2017, 7:55, Reply)

Post a new message | View older messages | Popular | Search