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Sniff my nutz

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 19:43, Reply)
Nope

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 20:34, Reply)

youtu.be/g8DGrc1uh7I
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 20:41, Reply)
Big tune

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 20:54, Reply)
No
It must be way out of date: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nutz
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 20:42, Reply)
Hello there!
Oh, and Bruce Forsyth is dead
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:37, Reply)
Shove it, Herman Munster

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:40, Reply)
Lillian

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:41, Reply)
I'd put some white streaks in her hair

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:47, Reply)
ha

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:50, Reply)
^

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:03, Reply)
^^

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:24, Reply)
well, hello, little fella!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:41, Reply)
I prefer the term 'compact'

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:41, Reply)
MURDERER!!!111!1!!! MODS HE KILLED BRUCIE !!!111!!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:41, Reply)
And I'd do it again
Condolences to his family and all that, but I couldn't fucking stand him
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:42, Reply)
I've passed that sentiment on.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:21, Reply)
Oh

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:43, Reply)
Yeah
So....looking forward to christmas? Looks like Tesco have already started selling Heroes with christmas packaging. Apparently this annoying for some reason.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:44, Reply)
I have, in fact, been making Christmas plans
because I do rather like spending time with my family. They're a good bunch and we'll have fun.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:47, Reply)
But your glad a man who did you no harm is dead

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:51, Reply)
I infer indifference

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:52, Reply)
As Gari says, I'm indifferent

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:53, Reply)
Not what you said up there

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:55, Reply)
I didn't say I was glad he's dead

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:57, Reply)
Err you killed him because you couldn't stand him, that must of brought pleasure

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:58, Reply)
Not as much as you might think

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:04, Reply)
we'll *I'm* glad you did it anyway
Someone had to deal with that wanker one way or another - he was out of control
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:06, Reply)
Good game, my fucking arse

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:11, Reply)
it probably is a bit gamey

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:46, Reply)
Dunno why you're so chirpy what with Forsyth carking it

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:44, Reply)
You've answered your own question there, m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:45, Reply)
Fair do's, what's for supper?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:45, Reply)
Cheese on toast? You can have a dash of lee & perrins if you're good

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:46, Reply)

b3ta.com/talk/8108169
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:49, Reply)
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:47, Reply)
I liked him in Bedknobs & Broomsticks

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:48, Reply)
Yeah, he's was alright in that
a total cunt in everything else though
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:51, Reply)
Got to be honest
I don't really remember him from anything else. I'm sure I've watched him in stuff but it hardly sticks in the mind. Higher or lower cards? Was that a gameshow?
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:51, Reply)
Play Your Cards Right
Generation Game, all sorts of shit like that.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:52, Reply)
All that shite was what I had to endure at my nan's on my mum's side.
Every weekend without fail they watched that, as regular as church on their Sundays,deviation was seemingly herecy. Cilla and Barrymore as well. They didn't have a video. I used to read the argos to pass the time.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:59, Reply)
urgh, unlucky

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:01, Reply)
It was even less fun than the Catholic services they made me go on.
Much preferred going to my atheistic grandparents; they had a vcr and some Palin books and stuff I could leaf through.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:03, Reply)
and don't forget all that aggro you got for wearing the wrong trousers that time

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:17, Reply)
Lol

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:50, Reply)
Hallo meine kleine flebenskunstlers
Haha, I'm pretending to be German!
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:49, Reply)
No he's not.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:49, Reply)
His wife seems to think he is

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:50, Reply)
She's thought that for 17 years
maybe he smells?
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:51, Reply)
I bet he does, he looks the sort
Mint imperials and wee, that's my guess
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:59, Reply)
He never brushed his teeth, and frequently used public toilets without washing is hands afterwards
I reckon
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:06, Reply)
I reckon he had a C19th egg cup which he used to rub his smeggy bellend in every night

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:07, Reply)
definitely

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:23, Reply)
As a far better man than I once said, '100% fact'.
#BreakfastAtJimis
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:28, Reply)
Didn't he do well

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:49, Reply)
yassssssssssssssssssssssssss
I had him down for this year.
Should have put a bet on
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:51, Reply)
Oh come on, the odds would not have been great

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:53, Reply)
Bookies won't place death bets

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:00, Reply)
By the way
He was a cantankerous old shit when a friend of mine had to direct him for a BBC Christmas promo, he apparently nearly made a few lady PA's cry.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:04, Reply)
you could have broken the news a bit more gently

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:09, Reply)
Ssshhhh *strokes head*
Brucie's dead
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:11, Reply)

ad lmit
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:13, Reply)
*chuckle*

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:14, Reply)

i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01728/chin_1728017c.jpg
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:15, Reply)
I never realised there were so many horrible people on this forum, it's been quite a shock

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:13, Reply)
I think they want to shock people then they laugh it off as banter

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:17, Reply)
I'm just showing off

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:18, Reply)
i'd stay away from the fp for a few days
those satirical geniuses on /board are going to be scathing
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:19, Reply)
Might report them to the police

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:22, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/board/11235376
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:24, Reply)
He'll stick himself on the fp the fucking cunt

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:26, Reply)
Yep no replies top of the fp, who do it manolith can you see? Captain wow by any chance or twat himself

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:41, Reply)
i can see why you'd think so, but it was actually rob
it only has 3 'likes' though. half the stuff on /talk's populol page have more than that
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:51, Reply)
Ginger cunt

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:52, Reply)
Come on rob if you are lurking defend this shit and your crap choice of back slapping mods? You fucking can't , you ruined this place you wanker

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:55, Reply)
I'd say his silence speaks volumes

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 18:54, Reply)
I'll bet some wag makes a picture of him looking like a zombie!!!
Haha, I love zombies!

brb, just working on my 'zombie escape plan'!!! haha!!!
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:26, Reply)
i learnt about it from facebook. on a status that said rip brucy <3
the first and only comment was 'bloody pedo'
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:15, Reply)
haha

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:15, Reply)
nice to see you
to see you, dead
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:11, Reply)
I text'd almost this exact joke to my mum a moment ago
and she replied with 'who's died?'

fucks sake, mum
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:12, Reply)
maybe she just thought you were threatening her

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:15, Reply)
lol
it's possible
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:16, Reply)
we're so cool

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:20, Reply)
We SO are
What with our Netflix and Fidget Spinners and Social Medias and such
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:22, Reply)
I liked his other catchphrase
"Shut it ya fuck trumpet"
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:14, Reply)
"last one to puke is a fucken bender"

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:17, Reply)
"I shit cunts like you for fackin' breakfast my son'
Takes me back
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:19, Reply)
"Make it hard or take your time wasting cock out of 'ere"

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:25, Reply)
Right, I'm off
Bye you pricks x
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:25, Reply)

off bent
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 17:30, Reply)
The person Sat adjacent from me just pulled out the dregs of a carefully clinged pack of digestives from their handbag and started eating them.
I just find that level of careful planning fucking revolting tbh.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 18:04, Reply)
6/7 today
www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-40927595
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:39, Reply)
i'm all quizzed out, soz

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:41, Reply)
shove it up your tired excuse
and fart it
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:45, Reply)
One quiz a day, drs orders

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:54, Reply)
Sounds like one of those homoerotic medicines
2can's so fond of
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:07, Reply)
ntt
why is this a thing?
ilovethe90s.seetickets.com/tour/i-love-the-90-s-?pre=ilt90spre
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:38, Reply)
Because people are cunts
We had someone come in last week asking us to put posters up for a Backstreet Boys concert

*edit* wrong boy band, it was Boyzone
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:40, Reply)
they are skint

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:42, Reply)
ugh

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:54, Reply)
Antititstamine

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:39, Reply)
Like what that one off of Mel & Kim had

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:41, Reply)
Slytherin
Your score:
2/7

yay
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:46, Reply)
Hufflepuff
yessssss
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:48, Reply)
SHITWANK

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:49, Reply)
to the tune of 'Top Cat'

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:52, Reply)
googling for the lyrics to the top cat theme, i found out that it was called 'boss cat' in the uk, at least for a time
can any of our, ahem... more mature posters confirm this?
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:57, Reply)
Old. They're old. And wankers

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:57, Reply)
It was to avoid being sued for breach of copyright by a brand of cat food.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:58, Reply)
so i read, but i remember watching it and it being called top cat so i guess they must have changed it at some point before my formative years

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:04, Reply)
Likewise.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:04, Reply)
Can confirm

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:02, Reply)
cool, thanks

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:04, Reply)
pickle rick
wilhughes3d.wixsite.com/wilhughes
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:26, Reply)
nice
that plumbus is pretty gross though
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:29, Reply)
if you click on shop you can buy them, might get my lad a mr meseeks print

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:30, Reply)
luckily i'm broke

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:40, Reply)
can confirm also
But the theme tune remained the same which was somewhat confusing
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:03, Reply)
hm, maybe that's why i remember it being top then
also, all the characters called him T.C.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:05, Reply)
It's for T'Boss Cat.
Yorkshire's most famous cartoon hero.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:09, Reply)
it was only written in the titles as boss cat, this is from 1989, how young are you?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=QoA43NdzTuU
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:16, Reply)
and the whole cartoon was a rip off of the phil silvers show

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:18, Reply)
Yeah but nobody remembers that unless they're well old lol.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:19, Reply)
phil silvers was fantastic, and a staple of bbc2 for years

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:20, Reply)
it's currently being repeated on forces tv
as is the A team
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:23, Reply)
A-Team is 2000% shitter than I remember

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:27, Reply)
can confirm

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:31, Reply)
One of those shows like Knight Rider and Magnum where you should watch the intro only, then turn it the fuck off
Just we're clear, this is NOT I REPEAT NOT the case with Manimal
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:32, Reply)
i still enjoy the A team
but never did like manimal
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:34, Reply)
Then I'm afraid we can no longer be friends.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:39, Reply)
how can we be lovers if we can't be friends?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:51, Reply)
It's easier than you'd think
I've had sex with people I fucking hate
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:05, Reply)
i usually don't hate them till after the sex

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:13, Reply)
I don't discriminate. m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:15, Reply)
disagree, magnum is still cool, but then it wasn't meant to be a kids show

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:34, Reply)
I set my BT box to 'record series'
I can assure you that after about 25 episodes you start to go a little mad. They made MILLIONS of them.

I did the same for Kojak, there must have been 100+ episodes.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:38, Reply)
oh i know they made a lot, and it did get shitter and shitter, it was good after the pub viewing for years tho on itv

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:44, Reply)
the magnum/murder, she wrote crossover episode was weird

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:57, Reply)
Manimal was ace.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:37, Reply)
Every week, I always wanted it to be the snake
and it was never the snake
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:57, Reply)
GS?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:02, Reply)
I wish

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:02, Reply)
keep believing x

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:17, Reply)
freeview?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:27, Reply)
no idea
i'm on virgin
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:33, Reply)
there's a frinkiac gif for that

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:31, Reply)

31.media.tumblr.com/4ee9c1c58155b1062349eb7b322f0fe4/tumblr_mf8cor9BgE1rsm741o1_500.gif
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:39, Reply)
not that young
must just be misremembering then. i guess it's easier to remember song lyrics than a title card. thanks all
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:30, Reply)
and it looks like it was the beeb being prissy about product placement in the titles more than anything else

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:33, Reply)
Oh, I thought it was to the tune of 'Love Shack'

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:58, Reply)
SHIT WANK BEBBEH

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:04, Reply)
shit wank is a little old place where we can get together, eh?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:05, Reply)
Yep, correct

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:33, Reply)
Heathcliff was a better cartoon with a better theme tune.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 18:06, Reply)
Dumbledore suspected the Sorting Hat may be in the early stages of Pick's disease

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:53, Reply)
prick's disease more like!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:07, Reply)
it's not funny, m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:11, Reply)
you just don't get it

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:16, Reply)
No, no, I get it
hahaha, it's funny! I get it! See??
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:26, Reply)
haha, this guy's alright

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:34, Reply)
I get no respect, no respect at all
*adjusts tie*
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:48, Reply)
+ r

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:07, Reply)
Drumbledore?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:12, Reply)
sorting hart

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:13, Reply)
ah ok

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:13, Reply)
hole in one

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:55, Reply)
WUN HUNDRED AN AYYYYYYTEE

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:55, Reply)

this/10
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:55, Reply)
ace

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:56, Reply)
i've watched it several times now, and i'll probably watch it several more

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:57, Reply)
5/7
What a nice score.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:57, Reply)
Slytherin
3/7. nailed the knitting one, though
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:07, Reply)
also scored 6/7 m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:08, Reply)
4 FOR ME

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:18, Reply)
bit greedy

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:32, Reply)
My kids thoroughly enjoyed "japanese camera man gets bowl broken over head"

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:52, Reply)
fuck I hate Java

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:44, Reply)
don't go there then, try bali

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:46, Reply)
Hindo's

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:57, Reply)
+cheeky

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:59, Reply)
don't spray it on then, try Africa

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:48, Reply)
Hindont's

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:58, Reply)
don't drink it then, try tea

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:48, Reply)
Hinwont's

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 15:58, Reply)
protect yourself tho
www.tradedirectinsurance.co.uk/Bad-Brew-Insurance.aspx
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:38, Reply)
Fuck I hate wriging covering letters
then I did this, then I did that, then I let this then I innovated blah blah blah fuck it would be so much easier if I just took some cocaine and turned on a voice to text app
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 16:30, Reply)
Well done McBeef
Yet again you've brought this place to a grinding halt. CHRIST, I hate him SO much. SO much.
What do YOU hate SO much? So much.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:25, Reply)
You right now

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:27, Reply)
Both of you need to cool down
Then cool up
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:31, Reply)
alright kelis

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:39, Reply)
Tggi

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:39, Reply)
i gotchu fam

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:18, Reply)
Trees
They are wankers.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:28, Reply)
Big branch-y cunts

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:39, Reply)
Got one which is about to cost me a fair few grand in repair bills
The absolute arsehole.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:54, Reply)
Don't forget their fucking leaves
Pricks
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:58, Reply)
nothing really
you know me, Mr Chill, don't really let anything get to me
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:29, Reply)
why'd you kill batman's parents then, joe?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:40, Reply)
I don't know enough about comic books to reply to this

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:44, Reply)
and yet, you did
batman's folks were killed by a man called joe chill
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:53, Reply)
Some men just want to watch the world bum, Mano

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:48, Reply)
that comma is unnecessary

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:52, Reply)
only 8 :(
www.watchuseek.com/quiz-really-know-iconic-watches-part-2/
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:34, Reply)
I got 5.
I like the watchmaker Moser
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:58, Reply)
Lovely watches, and even one made of Swiss cheese for lols

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:18, Reply)
that actually ended up being pretty interesting
www.hodinkee.com/articles/h-moser-swiss-mad-watch-swiss-cheese-limited-edition-venturer-introducing
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:35, Reply)
they are funny, but i agree that 60% of value means the watch could be cobbled together with chinese parts
www.h-moser.com/en/news/05-2017
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:41, Reply)
+on it
I like the watchmaker Moser grab your 40, let's get keyed
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:29, Reply)
I'm waiting on a Veronica gag

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:33, Reply)
I'm a lover not a hater
unless someone slightly annoys me of course, then I want to kill the cunt
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:35, Reply)
I'm a lover, not a fighter,
so when I strike, I aim for the erogenous zones.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:38, Reply)
the intelligentsia

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:38, Reply)
intelligenitals

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:40, Reply)
now you put it like that

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:41, Reply)
might patent that
trying to think of product ideas now
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:40, Reply)
woah

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:43, Reply)
The bourgeouis

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:47, Reply)
anyone who has ever shopped at waitrose

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:53, Reply)

media.giphy.com/media/Vy0o3e2OO7bji/giphy.gif
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:48, Reply)
That was one odd cheese advert

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:50, Reply)
Chinese version of the office

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:57, Reply)
that was racist of me
I apologise
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:58, Reply)
there is a difference between poor taste and being hateful
but I accept your apology
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:04, Reply)
WELL EXCUSE ME FOR BREATHING

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:00, Reply)
You're excused

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:04, Reply)
no m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:12, Reply)
Don't contradict me

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:16, Reply)
I will

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:17, Reply)
Won't

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:19, Reply)
why can't you just stop, yeah?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:16, Reply)
sick of it

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:18, Reply)
That 'yeah?' prick posted on here again the other day, yeah?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:32, Reply)
FrayBentos?
Man, he is SUCH a cock
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:43, Reply)
That's the cunt, yeah?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:50, Reply)
ps GAY BENT TOSS

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:50, Reply)
Gristle in my food
chewing some chicken and there's a bit that's connective tissue, tendon or cartilage - oh god it's like trying to chew wool. Just thinking about it sends tremors through my body yeahhrghhhhhh.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:23, Reply)
Thanks for that flashback
to that buffet in Beijing where what looked like chicken nuggets turned out to be gristle nuggets.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:28, Reply)
dahn't gwumble, give a whistle
and this'll help fings turrrn out for the beeeeessst
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:30, Reply)
My partner can chew on chicken legs and thighs
to the point it looks like it's been through a sand-blaster. Me? As soon as something bites back it's discarded.

I even find calamari disgusting because of the chewy texture. I actually gagged when I bit into some octopus sushi once.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:38, Reply)
I quite like calamari and octopus (had some of the latter last night, in fact),
but anything related to gristle, cartilage or greasy skin can fuck off.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 14:45, Reply)
Hey! You! The /talk steady crew!
Tell us weekend plans, do a wee, do a poo
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:26, Reply)
It's considerate of you to ask, Richard.
I'm going bowling and to the cinema on Sunday, and tonight is Friday drinks with some fashionable young people. Other plans are currenly pending.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:27, Reply)
Wot fillum?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:58, Reply)
A dramatisation of the life of Egon Schiele, fact fans.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:15, Reply)
wot, 'im who drew pics of himself with his knob out?
EDIT: yes
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:21, Reply)
mcbeef has been doing that for years and no one has seen fit to dramatise his life

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:23, Reply)
cos he's 100 years too late
or as he calls it "Le Wrong Generation"
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:23, Reply)
Should have called it "Le Wang Generation".

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:25, Reply)
*waggles cigar*

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:53, Reply)
That's the one.
If the film's not an hour and a half of a skinny Austrian man with his knob out, I'm asking for my money back.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:23, Reply)

chiele pengler
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:23, Reply)
^ collects spores, moulds and fungus.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:24, Reply)
well, not deliberately

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:26, Reply)
what a coincidence
Ragnarok also collects spores, moulds and fungi under his foreskin
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:24, Reply)
Including fifteen strains previously unknown to science.
At the gentlemen's club they call me "Tube Seat".
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:26, Reply)

A dramatisation of the life of Egon Schiele, fact fans. Emoji Movie
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:25, Reply)
I can't believe Patrick fucking Stewart had a hand in that offence against the seventh art.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:32, Reply)
I can, he's a northern prick

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:42, Reply)
Mate.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:50, Reply)
Oh, didn't see you there

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:08, Reply)
But he's supposed to have, like, gravitas and stuff.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:59, Reply)
Easy money to be made when your standards go out the window.
He'll be selling blow jobs to sailors next.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:26, Reply)
Chill tonight,
Bullshit stag do tomorrow. Recover and study sunday.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:29, Reply)
Post pics of your haircut.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:32, Reply)
I've decided to "miss my train" And just turn up for the dinner.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:37, Reply)
good lad

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:37, Reply)
There was a little gathering in town to show solidarity with the Charlottsvile stuff.
One of the people had a pretty elaborate sign tgat just said "racism is bad"
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:41, Reply)
Was it Jeremy Corbyn?
Sounds about his level
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:47, Reply)
+ mm'kay

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:15, Reply)

haircut pelmit
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:37, Reply)
I heard he sculpts his pubes into a bowl cut
then waggles his cock while saying in serious voice "it's life Jim, but not as we know it".
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:55, Reply)

he's the one in the shades
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:04, Reply)
looks like Amorous Badger to me

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:14, Reply)
Inlaws tomorrow
That's about it. Might have a wank
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:32, Reply)
combine the two to save time

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:34, Reply)
But who will hold my beer?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:36, Reply)
your father-in-law will surely lend a hand

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:27, Reply)
You're right
I could hold my own beer
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:28, Reply)
you've pretty much covered them with your post

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:33, Reply)

st o
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:34, Reply)
alright crazylegs mcbeefo
I'm off to the English seaside wearing my smartest kiss me quick hat
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:34, Reply)
I used to be mates* with Crazy Legs
His real name is Richard Colon lol


*this is something of an exaggeration, I'd see him a couple of times a year at b-boy events and we'd chat
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:37, Reply)

chat wank eachother off while doing increasingly complex breakdance routines.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:38, Reply)
my trademark 'naked windmill' was the talk of the town

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:39, Reply)
Oh that was you? I remember reading about that in B Boy Bumming magazine

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:41, Reply)
Yup
You didn't know you were mates with a celebrity, did you?
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:47, Reply)
Nope, will you sign my lino pls?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:52, Reply)
sure thing

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:53, Reply)
Now will you sign my winky pls?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:04, Reply)
by all means, flop it out

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:14, Reply)
Going to ice hockey on saturday
Watching Newcastle act like a dumpster on fire against Huddersfield on Sunday. YAY SPORTS!
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:41, Reply)
Go "oooo!" at the mental's newly decorated spare room
Then probably get pissed
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:43, Reply)
Family stroll around the city tomorrow
Prog rock mini-festival on sunday if I score a discount ticket.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:43, Reply)
So far so good, looks like kid is ON for this evening
Tomorrow night I think we're going to see the excellent Main Source at the Jazz Cafe.

Strikey jizz
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:48, Reply)
That could be alright.
I'm seeing Mr Scruff tomorrow.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:12, Reply)
PISSter GUFF more like!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:24, Reply)
Kiss the chuff, more like!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:31, Reply)
Emoji Movie more like

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:40, Reply)
Shut up m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:48, Reply)
not in a million years

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:49, Reply)
FUCKING CUNT, more like

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:47, Reply)
lol

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:51, Reply)
dunno, and lets be honest nobody gives a fuck

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:52, Reply)
I do, a bit

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:53, Reply)
Sharing is caring
Didn't you learn anything from My Little Pony?
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:56, Reply)
Was that the episode they did about sex toys?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:14, Reply)
Record shopping and nude beatboxing

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:28, Reply)
Don't scandalize mine

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:38, Reply)
alright sugarbear

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:40, Reply)
love that record

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:43, Reply)
innit tho

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:51, Reply)
Cocktails in Northern Quarter tomorrow afternoon.
Bit of spliffage. Bit of cooking.
Walking the new pooch. The usual.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 12:53, Reply)
Oh lol, one of the jurors on Martin Shikreli's fraud trial said he couldn't be impartial because 'he disrespected the Wu Tang Clan'.
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/aug/17/martin-shkreli-trial-jurors-wu-tang-clan
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:06, Reply)
The whole lot
Mentioned in the original Harpers article is amazing.

Here's the story behing the Wu Tang Clan -
Shkreli was revealed as the winner of an auction for the Wu-Tang Clan album Once Upon a Time in Shaolin after the single copy of the album was sold via Paddle8 on November 24, 2015, for US$2 million to what was reported to be a "private American collector". On December 9, 2015, Bloomberg Businessweek identified Shkreli as the purchaser. In October 2016, Shkreli claimed on his Twitter that he would release the album for free download if Donald Trump won the 2016 US presidential election and would destroy the album if Hillary Clinton won. He shared the intro and one track the day after Trump became the President-elect.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 13:27, Reply)
I've just been talking to a man about an upcoming boxing match conspiracy.
Apparently the Floyd vs Mayweather fight is a false flag catalyst for a race war, and I've even been shown an advert for actors in Las Vegas to be part of a crowd on the same weekend. Apparently this is proof.

Who is the craziest person you know? If you're McBeef, we know it's your ex, so maybe go with second craziest.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:44, Reply)
since the mocking-is-aggression bloke left my firm, I don't associate with many mentals these days
except you lot!!!11!1!1!
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:49, Reply)
Someone I went to school with
and knew fairly well as a yout. Disappeared for nearly a decade then resurfaced out of the blue, met up for a drink to catch up and found him to a be a hollowed out twitching shadow of the witty, talented and engaging person I remembered. Told me how he'd pulled some of his own teeth out because they were poisoning him, how Sony (the corporation) was going to marry him and his life story was going to be made into a film and he was going to bring down the government in the process.

I realised he'd been in and out of institutions for the time we'd not been in touch.

Now, I've had plenty of friends who have had mental health issues, but all have been aware of it and would rather be healthy. This is the first person I've known who thought he was the sanest person on the planet while clearly being completely delusional, probably a paranoid schizophrenic.

His tweets and facebook posts are tragic.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:49, Reply)
How sad

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:53, Reply)
sad!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:57, Reply)
Wait....
this post is about you, isn't it. I knew it sounded familiar.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
i... didn't actually read it until just now
too many words, you see

pretty sure i've never been a 'witty, talented and engaging person', though
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:03, Reply)
Well that's what threw me too

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:03, Reply)
Awful
but fascinating to see how his mind is trying to protect him. Aggressively rejecting anything that contradicts his world view, his need to be important and superior, the glee and sense of triumph "you wait until the truth comes out" kind of stuff.

In previous years he would have thought he was Napoleon or something, it's horrific but grimly interesting the way the human mind can malfunction. Same fears of poisoning, conspiracy, the stuff you read about but is so shocking when you see it in someone you actually know.

I've had my moments of mania, brought on by excess and sleeplessness, but I've always had sanity to return to. Seeing it take over another person is terrifying.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
Yeah, that's bad
Seems like he might need to go and stay somewhere safe for a while. Is he getting much support, do you know?
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:02, Reply)
He would need loved ones to section him I guess,
He's not going to be able to have the wherewithal to check in himself.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:06, Reply)
They've tried
the problem is that being totally batshit insane doesn't mean you're not also very clever. He can be extremely conniving and turn on people who are trying to help him. It's just fucking horrific for anyone around him - I follow him on social media just to warn anyone who engages with him unawares because he'll turn on them, accuse them of all sorts of stuff, much of it criminal e.g. poisoning, child abuse, murder etc.

He does fit in pretty well on Twitter though, I have to say.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:15, Reply)
He won't tell me
he is very secretive. I know he's been in and out of institutions but the nature of his illness is such that he thinks it's all a conspiracy to stop him bringing down the CIA/MI5 etc. We're all spies etc.

His family do what they can but he keeps trying to get them arrested for abusing him.

I kind of keep in touch with mutual friends but there's not much we can do.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:07, Reply)
he should sign up for an account here

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:10, Reply)
and tell us all about the latest guitars he's bought
and what his parrot is doing
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:11, Reply)
lol

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:21, Reply)
This was supposed to be a fun thread to poke fun at silly people.
I didn't want to do feelings.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:59, Reply)
that was me m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:01, Reply)
lol
what's his twitter name? I could do with a giggle.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:49, Reply)
I don't actually know them
but theres some utter fucking nutjob who is openly having a breakdown on Twitter and has been sending me dms to help sort their life out. I tried to be sympathetic but their dms were fucking constant. Fuck all that, I've got my own shit going on. Apparently because I have a husband I have no idea of what problems real life throws at you. Fucking nutter.
Hello.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:50, Reply)
Yikes
He sounds slightly dangerous. Also, hello.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:54, Reply)
no need to drag our private discussions onto here, BS :(((((

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:55, Reply)
Alright you revolting pervert
/ac
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:55, Reply)
surely by having a husband like yours, it just adds a whole NEW bunch of problems?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:58, Reply)
Touché

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:03, Reply)
timehop reminded me of that photo of him punching me today

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:05, Reply)
I'd like to see a photo of you getting punched.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:22, Reply)
you're one of the few people that could see it on facebook, but ok
i.imgur.com/nrpZT0b.png
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:27, Reply)
^no-sell

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:27, Reply)
I'm not going searching through your old Facebook photos like some sort of pervert.
You're selling that punch like a Bollywood b movie.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:28, Reply)
haha

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:29, Reply)
+again

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:33, Reply)
That'll be teh rubbish beer you're drinking

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:28, Reply)
8 years ago, i had even less money than i do now

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:35, Reply)
The best you can do to help them is screenshot all the mad stuff and post it here for us to read.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
Block.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:49, Reply)
i'm mad me, i just don't give a hoot

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:52, Reply)
^chicken oriental

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:54, Reply)

frinkiac.com/video/S01E12/L7puNoRznljGv2Q5uIf3ZVqIBEE=.gif
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
Madlad! ^^^

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
^radio rental

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:02, Reply)
^Ivan Lendl

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:11, Reply)
how many novelty ties do you own?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:12, Reply)
none, i'm cray

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:33, Reply)
dunno. a know a few people who believe in jesus and/or ghosts

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:57, Reply)
or JESUS GHOSTS

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:59, Reply)
the ghosts of christmas jesus

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
#infest

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:12, Reply)
I know some people who super believe in ghosts.
Tell stories about seeing the hanged nun at Godstow and all sorts of bollocks.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:02, Reply)
Me too
Their argument to me is always "you can't prove they DON'T exist".
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:03, Reply)
easy
show me the ghost of a horse
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:08, Reply)
Pervert

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:10, Reply)
you never see caveman ghosts, do you

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:13, Reply)
How many cavemen lived in spooky Victorian houses though?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:22, Reply)
good point
I withdraw my remarks
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:23, Reply)
I hide in the toilets and cry

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:58, Reply)

hide wank
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:01, Reply)
because of the coming race war?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:01, Reply)

frinkiac.com/gif/S07E02/1104352/1106187/VEhJTksgQUJPVVQgSVQu
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:05, Reply)
Two Hats

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:59, Reply)
mods

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
^ see what I mean?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:04, Reply)
*does nothing*

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:04, Reply)
I'd pay good money to see 'The Floyd' vs Mayweather

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
I'd pay good money to see Keith Floyd vs Mayweather

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:01, Reply)
RIP

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:04, Reply)
I dunno, my credulous ex wasn't crazy but she sure believed in some ridiculous bullshit.
She paid to attend a seminar on how to communicate with elementals and gave this complete charlatan Ä300 to spend a weekend listening to him spout the most outrageous tripe about embracing your inner slut; when she got home and told me about what he'd said, I got properly angry with her thinking about how that money could have been better spent. She also believes in elves and fairies and thinks that some people were put on this Earth in order to be sacrificed, the corollary of which is that the victims of the Holocaust were asking for it.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:05, Reply)


(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:06, Reply)
Well, that ended in a place I wasn't expecting

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:07, Reply)
Tell me about it.
She casually mentioned it in bed one night; I was so pissed off at the implications that I almost got dressed and went home.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:10, Reply)
almost?!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:29, Reply)
Yeah, I reckoned that flouncing wasn't going to make her change her opinion.
I did have a right go at her about it though. She said that her sister and her sister's boyfriend got incredibly riled up every time she talked about it...no shit, Sherlock.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:32, Reply)
It's hard to escape a sex swing without help
Y'know
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:40, Reply)
Oh, I know, m8.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:00, Reply)
Poland?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:12, Reply)
what a fucking twat

You, I mean
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:12, Reply)
luv u 4eva bbz xxx

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:15, Reply)
A now-dead methadone client.
One time she asked me if I knew a good lawyer. She explained that she needed one because her dad, who she said was black, had been getting her pregnant and then swapping out her womb with her sister's (pointing to a slight bulge in her belly to demonstrate) in order to try to have white children; also that the lawyer had to be really good, because her dad was Axl Rose. I'm pretty sure she believed every word as she was saying it.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:06, Reply)
Hugs not drugs

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:08, Reply)
Oh yeah, that reminds me.
About a month ago I got a call at work from a woman who wanted a quote for a telephone interpreter because she needed to call the CIA and tell them about a client of hers, who was a spy plotting to bring down the government. OK, love.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:09, Reply)
I hope you told her that the CIA were already monitoring all her phone calls.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:11, Reply)
Damn, I missed a trick there.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:12, Reply)
Pretty much every lady who has ever encountered my shrivelled winky
think I ejaculate mad cow disease. And shit, obv.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:12, Reply)
I'm not allowed to donate blood because of mad cow disease

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:14, Reply)
^scared of needles

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:15, Reply)
that too

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:24, Reply)
Likewise.
Mad cow disease, tattoos, having had male sexual partners...I think the only box I don't tick on their 'exclude' list is 'intravenous drug user'.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:18, Reply)
Mike Lindup

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:14, Reply)
delete this please

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:17, Reply)
^delete THIS please

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:18, Reply)
^delete this *points at crotch*

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:20, Reply)

media.tenor.com/images/c7e66a3efb9c5a53e988bca97df8f2d4/tenor.gif
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:22, Reply)
tremendous!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:35, Reply)
YOU TAKE THAT BACK

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:25, Reply)
Give him some Python, m8, you show him.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:27, Reply)
GS

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:40, Reply)
yet another gary barlow-inspired McBeef post
you've got to get over that band m8, the reunion's over.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:49, Reply)
I'll 'never forget' 'the That', m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:53, Reply)
My mother, but that is years of reading the Daily Mail
That shit has rotted her brain.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:17, Reply)
also, the artist formerly known as Catnipppp off of b3ta:
Looks like he's gone off Donald Trump, which is a shame because he was an early adopter.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:21, Reply)
Wow, who knew that white supremacist and Nazi sympathiser Donald Trump was secretly Jewish?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:23, Reply)
does he still do pics for infowars?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:23, Reply)
Probably.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:27, Reply)
I'm not clicking that, might be facebook and shit

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:24, Reply)
It's amazing.
Honestly. I've signed up.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:29, Reply)
I bet you have

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:30, Reply)
Here's a non-FB link, if you want.
I never realised how many female celebrities were actually "male to female tranny freaks".
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:39, Reply)
ok
Not sure the phrase "fucking stupid fucking cunt" really explains this, but it's the first one that comes to mind
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:42, Reply)
The whole thing screams bona fide certifiable insanity to me.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:54, Reply)

110% truth, except for the Israhell star on Trump. Donald Trump is 100% against the Federal Reserve which he will abolish, confiscate all assets of the Rothschild Mafia. That will cut off the head of the snake.

Trump will prosecute false flags like 9/11, Oklahoma City, Sandy Hook and many more. Fast and Furious and illegal wars. We will need to have Nuremburg style trials and hang at least 1000 treasonous zionist scumbags and their useful idiots.

Trump is for real and teaming up with Russia and Putin we can bring real world peace for centuries to come or possibly eternity. War is primitive, cruel, disgusting and no good for anything, except for the zionistís plan to exterminate 98% of all mankind, enslave survivors in a one world communist jew dictatorship.

Trump will be our last chance to save America and all mankind. We cannot allow anything other than a historical massive landslide election victory. Otherwise they will rig the voting and steal the election to install another zionist puppet. JFK didnít prosecute the zionist cockroaches and had little security. Trump is wise to their game and will not allow them a chance to kill him. A military strike would be their only chance and that will not be allowed by Americans.

If they dare to murder Trump, we must take them out immediately by a ruthless and massive 2nd amendment civilian militia force with US military patriots as our backup.

WE WILL TAKE AMERICA BACK AND HOPEFULLY IT WILL BE PEACEFUL BUT WE ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT ALLOW ANOTHER FALSE FLAG, RIGGED ELECTIONS OR JFK/RFK STYLE ASSASSINATIONS OF OUR CANDIDATES/PRESIDENTS.

ANYBODY WITH AN IQ OVER 80 SHOULD SEE THE ZIONIST JEWS ARE BEHIND 99.99% OF ALL EVIL IN THIS WORLD. WITHOUT THEM WE COULD HAVE LASTING WORLD PEACE. CONTINUED ZIONIST CONTROL WILL ONLY CONTINUE THE ENDLESS WAR, THIRD WORLD INVASION, GENOCIDE OF WHITE EUROPEANS AND OTHER HUMANS WHO POSSESS INTELLIGENCE.

THE JEWS ONLY WANT STUPID THIRD WORLD PRIMATES AS SLAVES, AS THEY HAVE CENTURIES OF SLAVERY ALREADY PROGRAMMED INTO THEIR DNA. WHERE AS INTELLIGENT PEOPLE WILL REVOLT AND KILL THE ZIONIST TO GAIN FREEDOM AND JUSTICE.

THIS IS REAL. IT IS HAPPENING NOW. IT WILL BE STOPPED BY US!
SO WAKE THE FCK UP. SNAP OUT OF IT NOW!
LOCK AND LOAD BOYS AND GIRLS, IT IS TIME FOR TYRANT HUNTING.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:05, Reply)
Wow
Imagine actually believing all of this. Imagine being this angry all the time.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:07, Reply)
my peanus gets angry all the time

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:12, Reply)
I know, I've seen it!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:14, Reply)
it got so angry with me it spat at me

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:18, Reply)
This is exactly the sort of person
who used to have a Geocities page featuring a 10,000-word rant on a white background with no paragraph breaks and dotted with pictures of the Eye of Prominence, masonic squares and compasses, 'grey' aliens and Fort Knox.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:15, Reply)
BELIEVE

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:18, Reply)
you appear to know too much about me which leads me to suspect you are working for THEM

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:19, Reply)
Fuck
FUCK
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:25, Reply)
wow that's really made me think

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:00, Reply)
I don't know any mental people
Funnily enough I was only talking about this the other day over breakfast, with Jimi Hendrix.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:24, Reply)
haha

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:24, Reply)
IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHO THE MENTAL ONE IS!!! THAT MEANS IT'S PROBABLY YOU!!!
#deep
#philosphy
#livelaughlove
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:27, Reply)
Live fast...too bloody fast sometimes!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:28, Reply)
Don't watch the clock,
Do what it does and keep going.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:32, Reply)

l
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:38, Reply)

going circling the same central point in an inexorable spiral of abstraction, futilely ticking off each second as a testament to the pointlessness of your own existence.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:46, Reply)
+ and so say all of us! and so say all of us!

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:47, Reply)
The river doesn't cut through rock because of its power, but because of it's persistence

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:51, Reply)
yeah, bloody-mindedly hammering away at something
is a better approach than circling the obstacle and getting on towards your goal with the least resistance, like most fucking rivers do.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:56, Reply)
Good, better, best. Never let it rest. 'Til your good is better and your better is best.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:00, Reply)
because of it is persistence are we led it off the road?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:59, Reply)
Not my words, the words of BrainyQuote.com

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:01, Reply)
ZanyScrote.com, more like.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:05, Reply)
Hang on
He was with me helping to scatter the ashes of Francis Rossi?!?!?
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:44, Reply)

Francis Martini
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 11:08, Reply)
morning

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 7:15, Reply)
Mornang

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 7:28, Reply)
I never forget a face
but in your case I'm prepared to make an exception
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 7:33, Reply)
'ning

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 7:30, Reply)
I'm on a whisky diet
I've lost 3 days already
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 7:34, Reply)
Morning
Left my phone on all night and the battery is just about dead
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 7:53, Reply)
Start the day with a smile
and get it over with.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 7:57, Reply)
Morning guy's
I wonder if I'll be allowed to see my kid tonight
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 7:56, Reply)
Your ex sent her photograph to the Lonely Hearts club
They sent it back stating they weren't that lonely.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 7:58, Reply)
well I don't think you should be given the massive amount of inconvenience you cause to that girl's poor mother

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:23, Reply)
I ruined her evening plans last week by turning up at 6:20pm
I should be b& 4 lyf
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:08, Reply)
come on m8 you know London is dead after 7pm

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:09, Reply)
I was bang out of order, no question

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:15, Reply)

b w
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:43, Reply)
lol

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:44, Reply)
Alright.
Some wanker has put a side car on a transalp. And won't sell them separately. Might go down there to have a look and push it over.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:05, Reply)
that was me, m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:10, Reply)
Take the side car off. Get in it. And roll yourself off a pier.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:15, Reply)
I'm more of a marina guy

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:17, Reply)

ri a u a
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:20, Reply)
that too

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:21, Reply)
Chopsticks are the reason the Chinese never invented custard

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:23, Reply)
7 ways to love

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:10, Reply)
I had no idea that tune was by St Etienne

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:22, Reply)
Cola Boy wasn't it?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:43, Reply)
If you want to know what God thinks of money
look at all the people he gave it to
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:23, Reply)
bestimmt mein oberstmorgenführer

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:11, Reply)
google translate is shit

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:12, Reply)
Every time a friend success
I die a little
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:23, Reply)
What up, he who roams the plains of bison grass?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:11, Reply)
I have kleptomania
When it gets too bad, I take something for it
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:24, Reply)
Night in a hotel, and an "all you can eat" breakfast, so this counts as being on holiday.
Morning.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:17, Reply)
wife kicked you out?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:18, Reply)
make sure to spread the cornflakes over the counter and leave toast crumbs everywhere

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:22, Reply)
Never trust a man with short legs
His brain's too near his bottom
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:24, Reply)
That makes no sense.
What if he had a regular length body?
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:30, Reply)
take it up with Noel Coward m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:35, Reply)
I I just took a ride in a Grrrmachine and I'm still feeling mean

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:22, Reply)
gay

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:25, Reply)
Don't sweat the petty things
and don't pet the sweaty things
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:25, Reply)
Never hurry, never worry,
never fill your hat with curry.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:29, Reply)
wiser words were never spoken

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:30, Reply)
although if you are going to fill a hat with chilli
it's best to use a beanie
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:31, Reply)
and after you've eaten
put on your fed-ora
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:31, Reply)
You could have enough chilli to fill a bowl-er.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:33, Reply)
I still can't believe they didn't put Hawkwind on the back of the new ten pound note

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:26, Reply)
you don't really need any further proof that the jews are running everything for their own interests

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:31, Reply)
it's staring us all in the face

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:41, Reply)
30 years since that slag Michael Ryan went a bit spaz
It still freaks my nut out to this day.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:26, Reply)
I do appreciate a man who uses an M1 carbine

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:29, Reply)
I wonder if illiterate people get the full benefit from alphabet soup

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:30, Reply)
you have to be a muslim to do that nowadays, political correctness gone mad

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:34, Reply)
member the good old days, when all our terror attacks and murders were by white non muslims, member

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:54, Reply)
member when it was catholics planting nailbombs in high streets? good old days

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:30, Reply)
Gosh, it rained heavily last night, but now it's a sunny
MORNING
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:50, Reply)
Warn is God's way of teaching Americans geography

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:53, Reply)
God know's her limits
and doesn't interfere with the ignorance of 'mericans.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:54, Reply)
and warn ever changes

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:57, Reply)
Warn! what is it good for
Abolutelyn othing!
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:01, Reply)
PayPal's steam- and hamster-driven servers are on the fritz again.
Tried to wire some money out last night and was told that they needed proof of my identity, again, despite having received it on 15 July. So I sent off a scan of my passport again. Got an e-mail from them this morning saying they needed proof of address. Logged into my account, was able to wire money, everything was fine. k.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 8:59, Reply)
The emails weren't actually from PayPal, hth

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:04, Reply)
Luckily I sent nothing via e-mail, and I did get the original notification from my online PayPal account space.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:08, Reply)
You've just allowed a nigerian to use your passport to get into the EU
I hope you're satisfied
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:06, Reply)
Come on, those FIFTY MILLION EUROPEAN POUNDS were just burning a hole in his pocket.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:08, Reply)
Just pay your taxes you shifty little shit

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:14, Reply)
lol
I'm in a mood to move to London and scrounge your benefits by claiming asylum as a transsexual Muslim single mother. Take that, house prices.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:18, Reply)

benefits by claiming asylum as a transsexual Muslim single mother.
, house prices
discography
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:21, Reply)
Take That, eh? What was all that about anyway?

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:30, Reply)
Regretting taking my cheap tent.
Top pole split as I was putting it up.

Wind caught it and I trod on one of the cleats running after it.

Woke up to spray coming through the zip.

One less thing to cart home I guess.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:24, Reply)
Trying is the first step towards failure m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:28, Reply)
I've stopped it wobbling in the wind by lashing the top poles together with a guy rope.
For some reason I forgot my usual roll of tape and tie wraps for emergency tent repair.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:37, Reply)
Waking up to spray coming through the zip is a symptom of eight beers and tight jeans.

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:32, Reply)
Lightweight

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:38, Reply)
morning
cunting tab key doesn't work on this stupid fucking work mac
might kill myself
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:44, Reply)
bit radical m8

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:46, Reply)
"work mac" always feels like an oxymoron to me

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 9:47, Reply)
I reckon most of the advantages are due to them not integrating with the plethora of 'enterprise' software.
Sharepoint, office Live, symantec, mcafee et al.
(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 10:20, Reply)
morning

(, Fri 18 Aug 2017, 7:11, Reply)
Just remembered my password.
Fuck off.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:39, Reply)
Dunno who you are, soz

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:44, Reply)
Better than Dozer.
Is that sufficient?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:54, Reply)
Not sure you alt-doz are better than the ban-doz to be honest , certainly better than them is objective, but what do I know eh

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:11, Reply)
Riddick just starting on film 4, never made a bad film eva

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:05, Reply)
Alright jeff

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:51, Reply)
Aye.
You? If you are the real
Dozer.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:54, Reply)
Yeah it's me you Savile wanker

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:19, Reply)
Well done

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:54, Reply)
Thanks. I like online validation.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:54, Reply)
Hi

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:59, Reply)
I might have a small rum.
What do you think?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:00, Reply)
Why small?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:06, Reply)
Because I only have pint glasses
And any measure deemed large in such a drinking vessel might be deemed excessive.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:09, Reply)
Drink it by the swallow then

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:12, Reply)
Finish the bottle, it's the only solution
it'll only go flat if you open it and leave it
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:31, Reply)
That's why people buy it in tins now

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:37, Reply)
Fuck a dog

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:46, Reply)
He might fuck a small horse

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 22:00, Reply)
Just done my third shit. Arse hurts.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 22:03, Reply)
What, ever?
That's bloody good going
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 22:08, Reply)
Today.
If I go more than about a day without a barry I get a bit perturbed.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 22:23, Reply)
1 or 5?
www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=barry
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 22:38, Reply)
Flebthread

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 17:27, Reply)
i read that as flatbread at first
now i know it's flebthread i don't think i now how to contribute

alt - sympathy reply
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:15, Reply)
Is that anything like phlebotomy?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:31, Reply)
Tools down, sod off dahn the pub.
I've got naff-all to do today and it's raining like a pissing cow, as the French say. How goes it, fellow flebeians?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:19, Reply)
Have you got poor old cadders on ignore?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:21, Reply)
Not at all, it was an unintentional threadstomp caused by posting at exactly the same time as him.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:26, Reply)
It's alright, he was always a complete bellend anyway.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:27, Reply)
Thank you sir, may I have another?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:34, Reply)
nah

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:24, Reply)
just got a hole in one, good times

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:26, Reply)
IBYD, YDOB

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:28, Reply)
now i'm in the rough, ffs

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:29, Reply)
That's Portuguese birds for you.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:32, Reply)
it's a play off for the 6000 coins..

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:33, Reply)
i lost, fuck you golf clash :(

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:35, Reply)
and none of you told me about this because....
www.flamefest.co.uk/
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:03, Reply)
Helena Von Kuntz didn't want you there, soz

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:27, Reply)
she needs to grow up

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:28, Reply)
D'ya know what?
I am contemplating going for a poo
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:26, Reply)
Deep, man.
Deep.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:28, Reply)
If it's like the one from earlier it will be explosive, shallow
and quickly expressed.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:29, Reply)
The emvee of poos.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:39, Reply)
poo shit wee wee

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:27, Reply)
bum pissy-wissy

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:37, Reply)
listen to the boys with the shrivelled little willies

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 20:40, Reply)
bit sticky

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:34, Reply)
Yeah, not bad. Just got my 19th Front Page, one more and I can leave here forever

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:35, Reply)
I'm clicking every single one of your posts m8

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:39, Reply)
Called home for an emergency
Now working from the sofa. Turned out reet nice.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:35, Reply)
Did you program your sofa this morning to call you this afternoon?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:40, Reply)
I got a distress signal from it
Came through on the sofa emergency hotline
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:50, Reply)
"I'm king low!"

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:47, Reply)
Still very warm here
Just cleaned the kitchen, which was a bad idea. Now everything else looks dirty.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:48, Reply)
The solution is to cook something messy involving as many pans as possible, so your kitchen will match the rest again.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:52, Reply)
shit on the floor

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:54, Reply)
+ get schwifty

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 17:20, Reply)
can't decide if I want to go to a six hour+ gig on sunday

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:38, Reply)
oh
what a terrible dilemma
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:41, Reply)
six hours outside m8
and one of the bands is Opeth. I'll be surrounded by blade-studiers.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:46, Reply)
don't go then

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:49, Reply)
but I like those bands
and I won't get the chance to see them again for ages
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 17:06, Reply)
It's not even proper music, just noise, there

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 17:27, Reply)
soz, I like the music
at least 4 of the 5 bands playing, might just come later and see the main acts.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 17:58, Reply)
Would there be a Nazi contingent there?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 18:04, Reply)
Almost certainly.
Loads of proper unpleasant racists in metal.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 18:21, Reply)
Oh I know, I just wondered if it would be very blatant in poland, they talk about them in usa, but there's millions in former ussr places

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 18:40, Reply)
Recruiter woes.
One phoned me yesterday for a job in embra. Sounded decent but in python rather than java, I wanted to learn that anyway.

He tried to organise a phone interview but I said I was on holiday, when he asked I told him it was in Edinburgh, he was eager to put me in for an interview. Told him I was camping so I'd be a scruff, said it was fine. Said he'd email the details, heard fuck all. Said alright, prepared not to get smashed today.

Hear fuck all, finally get through to him - yeah they're not that interested but I hoped to talk them round.

I'm not surprised, I was basically asking their top line to code in a language I don't know, I'd not employ me. Would've been nice to tell me rather than leave me wondering if I've got an interview on undisclosed Edinburgh tomorrow though.

I'm going to rejoin my plan to get smashed, the one I had before he phoned yesterday.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:43, Reply)
hate using recruitment agencies
I try and go direct where possible
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:47, Reply)
I just wanged my CV up on monster and let them do the work.
I should probably look for myself.

One recruiter has been really good and supportive, but they've got loads of really corporate jobs for banks, sounds a bit too serious.

I've spent the last 8 years in a big firm and want to work for a smaller more human outfit. Considering contracting.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:48, Reply)
you will get loads of time wasters calling you up now

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:50, Reply)
Yeah regretting not redacting my phone number.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:52, Reply)
lol wang

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 17:40, Reply)
Recruiters would sell your kidneys if the going rate was good
None of em are trustworthy
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:53, Reply)
Oh I don't trust them.
But if one might get me an interview, I still think it prudent to not get cunted the day before until I have it confirmed it's not happening.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:56, Reply)
Not too bad thanks Lindup old boy
Out for Vietnamese tonight
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:43, Reply)
Only fuck the ones that cough, oh ahaha

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:45, Reply)
eh?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:47, Reply)
hahaha

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:49, Reply)
I dinnae get it, mon

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 17:19, Reply)
Me either
I just thought it sounded funny
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 19:54, Reply)
Full metal jacket, innit.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 21:46, Reply)
?
i.imgur.com/Vscdbv7.jpg
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:49, Reply)
FRAVORTOWN!

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 16:50, Reply)
Alright Kebab of the End Times
I'm off to watch that Annabelle film.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 17:19, Reply)
wow, it's all kicking off in Spain right now

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 17:22, Reply)
yeah not good

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 17:41, Reply)
Can't blame ETA for this one

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 18:05, Reply)
Thank fuck for brexit

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 19:28, Reply)
I hate and fear Track & Field events
Am I racist?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:19, Reply)
Yes

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:21, Reply)
Yup

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:30, Reply)
That's enough looking back at the good old days.
How are we going to bring b3ta talk up to date and keep it relevant in this future we now live in?
Maybe a Snapchat share page?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:30, Reply)
You have to post the Instagram pic of your most recent unicorn latte to create an account.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:32, Reply)
hatred, bigotry and violence on many sides

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:34, Reply)
...on many sides

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:39, Reply)
LIKE A DODECOHATERON

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:26, Reply)
^dodecahomoron

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:35, Reply)
homo AND moron. well played

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:17, Reply)
A complete unknownateron

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:21, Reply)
I've said nothing of substance but I'm going to pretend it's well profound by dejectedly repeating the last few words ... the last few words

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:44, Reply)
wanking

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:36, Reply)
Sex robots for everyone
Failing that, less good sex robots
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:37, Reply)
You mean robots that do less good sex?
or fewer robots that do the good sex?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:10, Reply)
Whatever is in the project budget range

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:43, Reply)
I definitely think we should have some webinars.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:38, Reply)

w fl
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:42, Reply)
^Innovention

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:10, Reply)
I imagine dog ears and a floppy tongue on every user name

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:38, Reply)
ibyd, ydob

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:26, Reply)
There's this really cool web forum called Voat, yeah?
See you there!
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:38, Reply)
cool!

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:43, Reply)
Not going
Don't want to ruin the hollow echo it currently makes
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:44, Reply)
email alerts every time someone replies to one of your comments or comments on a thread you have replied to

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:56, Reply)
rip my inbox

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:58, Reply)
Can do!

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:12, Reply)
greater gender and ethnic diversity
perhaps make a black or a girl top mod so that losers with too much time on their hands from all backgrounds have something to aspire to
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:58, Reply)
dish of the day

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:59, Reply)
B3ta gold.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:59, Reply)
a range of emojis to replace the I like this! button

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:59, Reply)

[wank] [guff] [nan] [helimit] [zzzz]
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:31, Reply)
Eek
forgot [poopo]
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:03, Reply)
league tables and a regulatory body, possibly called Ofb3t

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:01, Reply)
b3tamon
you can run around finding your favorite b3tans and throwing something soft/medium at them for points.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:01, Reply)
strict limits on the amount of replies you can post to a thread within a certain time frame

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:01, Reply)
Which can be increased for a nominal fee?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:39, Reply)
a discord channel so that we can live chat on what people have just posted

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:02, Reply)
a celebrity version of the site

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:02, Reply)
Didn't Jeremy Corbyn used to be on here?
Ann Coulter's fanclub posts on /links
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:29, Reply)
Jonathon King used to post here.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:41, Reply)
I'm sure he's had that tattoo'd on a few young men's bums

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:02, Reply)
/links

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:05, Reply)
I get as much good sex as I want and I drive a fast car

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:10, Reply)
You're Tracey Chapman's boyfriend
AICMFP
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:28, Reply)
Is there a way to make it fewer shit maybe?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:11, Reply)
arrows

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:12, Reply)
say no more, fam

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:20, Reply)
Collectable icons , that you can battle with in b3ta gyms

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:12, Reply)
^super effective

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:14, Reply)
Cake?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:18, Reply)
I've suggested cash prizes in the past
and yet the mods do nothing
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:20, Reply)
Bloody mods

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:40, Reply)
And the rockers too
we saw fine people on many sides, the greased up ones on their motorbikes and the others on their mopeds with so many beautiful mirrors. So sad.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:01, Reply)
i'd have to win the first one just so there was some cash to give out

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:36, Reply)
not posting stupid shit threads that just generate loads of replies with no actual conversation

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:25, Reply)
^Upset

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:27, Reply)
too bloody right I am

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:27, Reply)
would you like to talk about this suggestion?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:27, Reply)
only if you completely agree with me and don't challenge my worldview

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:34, Reply)
It's not up to me what happens in the replies

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:29, Reply)
take some responsibility for your actions

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:36, Reply)
naked breasts on page 3

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:26, Reply)
My set has been described as extremely rude, downright disgusting, in incredible bad taste but funny.
That's just fine by me. I mean, I can't knock it, it is pretty strong.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:27, Reply)
Who said this?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:30, Reply)
Prince Charles

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:32, Reply)
lol

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:37, Reply)

jelly.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post543641#answers-post-2629346
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:37, Reply)
is this worth me logging out for?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:48, Reply)
Almost certainly not
Man brags (or lies) about his AMAAAYZING life, filled with sports cars, celebrities and beautiful women.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:50, Reply)
he was a prick, desperate to be liked on here, which was conflicting with how wonderful his life was

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:55, Reply)
i'm not 100% on this but i think he was the one that was supposed to be so tough irl that you'd better not say anything nasty or he might beat you up

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:31, Reply)
woah
so he's cool AND dangerous. And pretty old, by all accounts.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:32, Reply)
probably dead now

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:40, Reply)
lol
b3ta.com/talk/1877332
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:51, Reply)
So macho

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:05, Reply)
Are you a sentient badger?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:32, Reply)
i'm sure him and donkey gums will win edinburgh this year

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:34, Reply)
the greatest stand up of our generation

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:45, Reply)
poor pistonbroke

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:31, Reply)
more upset

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:28, Reply)
we should all gang up on one person till they cry, that used to be fun

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:29, Reply)
this would be perfect if there was anyone left to do that to
the only ones left with any real potential to get upset are fucksocks, who everyone has on ignore, or yeti kebab, who is too quick to put others on ignore
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:48, Reply)
nah, i think there is one, i'll gaz everyone except them of course

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:54, Reply)
Yeah I'm not missing out on much by him having me on 2.0
Who else is she ignoring?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:03, Reply)
safe spaces

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:28, Reply)
Like disabled parking spaces?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:32, Reply)
Like 'em?? I LOVE 'em!

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:38, Reply)
that's where you go cruising for tail, innit?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:25, Reply)
they're less likely to run away

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:26, Reply)
A weekly rundown of the top posts and threads
Presented by a prominent Youtuber
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:41, Reply)
Coming up in this vid we've got the TOP. FIVE. POSTS. made on beeta dot com slash talk this week
and I guarantee that you will be SHIT TING YOUR SELF by the end of this video. However, before we get down to it I want to thank all you lovely new subscribers who've been posting their comments on my other vids so CLICK HERE to check those vids out, and don't forget to SMASH THE SHIT out of the LIKE button on this vid. As always I read everything you write to me so leave your comments below and don't forget to subscribe. And now...

[insert pointless 45 second intro sequence with explosions and a THX-style BWAUM noise ]
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:44, Reply)
youtube has basically become the sunday chart review on local radio

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:46, Reply)
the current top 5 are mostly posts making fun of 2 can 'my wife is an elephant' chunder

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:32, Reply)
bring back [popular poster]
(s)he'll soon liven things up a bit
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:50, Reply)
I follow some former b3tans on twitter
and I can confirm that ^this will not 'liven things up'
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:52, Reply)
but the good old days, TH ... what about the good old days?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:55, Reply)
did you not read this morning's thread?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:57, Reply)
surely no one is reading any of this shite

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:58, Reply)
cor!
muff!
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:52, Reply)
Go back in time, kidnap Shambles before he turned into a troll and bring him to the present day.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:55, Reply)
he was far too nice years ago, well in with all the fat chicks

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 13:57, Reply)
I bet he stole Badger's wife and all.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:02, Reply)

b3ta.com/talk/8096608
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:04, Reply)
Eh, I thought he was pretty funny at one stage.
Then he became a bellend, obviously.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:13, Reply)
he had his moments
then again, so did baldmonkey
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:17, Reply)
Bloody hell!!! I'm using Adobe Media Encoder
it's fucking awesome. I wish I knew what all these buttons do!

I feel like I did that time I was in the cockpit of a 777...
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:09, Reply)

a 777 Flight 11
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:12, Reply)
strike through in and pit of 777 and replace with on

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:14, Reply)
for you and mcbeef:
lanamacondo.tumblr.com/post/144719920453/frosted-tips
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:43, Reply)
I'm wanking

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:48, Reply)
i assumed

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:57, Reply)
s'good innit
we use it a lot here in the edit suite
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:33, Reply)
The main difference I think
is that you'll know what all the gubbins does. I'm just relying on the settings that the previous person put together. Hurrah!
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 14:42, Reply)
poo shit wee wee

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:15, Reply)
Dancing hamster gifs

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 15:16, Reply)
Lolotronolololocopter!!
OX1 checking in
Weather: clearing
Interest in work: 5%
Time until hometime: 5 hours 38 minutes
Laziness: 100%
Eating: toast
Greediness: 40%
Same shit different dayness: 100%

Report in please.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:22, Reply)
Workload: 160%
Horniness: unicorn
Chances of family name dying out in the next generation: 100%
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:24, Reply)
Who cares
We're all forgotten in three generations anyway
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:25, Reply)
it's the news that my brother is also having a daughter
so that'll be the end of my Dad's dynasty. I think it might trigger a breakdown of some sort.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:27, Reply)
Well I hope he takes it well
because really, it doesn't matter
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:29, Reply)
shut up chester bennington, you're supposed to be dead

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:30, Reply)
I don't understand this joke
unless you actually think that's my name, and believe me to be dead
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:31, Reply)
Linkin Park innit
youtu.be/eVTXPUF4Oz4?t=54s
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:33, Reply)
Oh right
That was terrible
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:35, Reply)
damn right

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:38, Reply)
I just asked Tangled if he had a nice holiday
Apart from that, I ain't reporting shit
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:25, Reply)
did he?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:31, Reply)
Windy posted this thread before Tangled had a chance to respond
So naturally, I've reported this to the mods
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:32, Reply)
And still the mods do nothing.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:35, Reply)
oh i'm doing something

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:42, Reply)
gross

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:55, Reply)
I might post a skink.
Mods are powerless
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:04, Reply)
Shots fired
www.californiaherps.com/lizards/images/esskiltonsisk.jpg
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:15, Reply)
Skink out with your tongue out
www.aboutanimals.com/images/Irian-jaya-blue-tongued-skink-820x375.jpg?d8bc0c
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:17, Reply)

www.vblcs.com/images/labels/2010/nsw/3.2.png
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:28, Reply)
I wonder if it's any good

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:29, Reply)
i liked it, SAB shut them down it seems in 2014

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:31, Reply)
NSFW m8
that photo's a bit blue
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:17, Reply)
damn rebellious kids

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:18, Reply)
N12 checking in
Reasonably sunny
IDGAF
7h 35min
150%
nowt
nowt
willy
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:26, Reply)
#rude

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:29, Reply)
#nude

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:18, Reply)
Nowt Nowt Willy sounds like a yorkshire remake of Strike It Lucky

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:30, Reply)
It's the nullo anthem, sung to the tune of Ice Ice Baby

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:34, Reply)
you'd know

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:35, Reply)
SHIT IT OUT

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:30, Reply)

willy let it all out, these are the willies we can do without
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:31, Reply)
And lo, I watched your ninja editing unfold before my very eyes.
Y3T1 checking in
Weather: a pretty unenthusiastic bluish sky
Interest in work: 13%
Time until hometime: 5 hours 35 minutes
Laziness: 85%
Eating: currently nothing, but I had an apple about half an hour ago
Greediness: 40%
Same shit different dayness: sorry, the meter appears to have melted on this one.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:28, Reply)
Lindup: 100%

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:29, Reply)
Huuuuge tracts of land: 78%

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:31, Reply)
ehwhat?!
RED5 Standing By
Weather: bumholes
Interest in work: fair
Time until hometime: urgh
Laziness: 73%
Eating: crunchy apple
Greediness: godicouldowithalineofcokeandashotofwhiskey
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:29, Reply)
he was a fucking walter mitty prick

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:30, Reply)
I can't even remember who started this whole thing.
Only one I found on search was stuj and tfd
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:36, Reply)
it was that comedy-at-the-george pillock

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:37, Reply)
I wonder if he ever made a career out of comedy.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:40, Reply)
nope just ripping people off
www.thelset.com/
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:49, Reply)
looks like a cunt

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:50, Reply)
oh he was
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/education/4950838.stm
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:51, Reply)
What a heinously minging website that is.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:51, Reply)
that website is horrible
and this, by the man himself, is a visual atrocity: www.thelset.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/YOUR-RULES-jpeg-729x1024.jpg
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:51, Reply)
I bet it says sleep with dirty old men in there somewhere

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:53, Reply)
/r/dontdeadopeninside

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:56, Reply)
Fucking hell.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:56, Reply)
I expect monster munch to get really upset that he can't solve that dingbat

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:11, Reply)
up yours, plod

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:36, Reply)

jelly.b3ta.com/talk/8107370
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:37, Reply)
soz windy posted this thread before I had chance to respond and I was busy gazzing the mods
it was lovely, ta.
I did overeating, over-drinking, oversleeping and did it with a lady
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:43, Reply)
As long as you didn't overdo it with a lady.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:48, Reply)
difficult to overdo something in 18 seconds, mat8

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:52, Reply)
holy shit!
Does your wife know?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:54, Reply)
shh

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:01, Reply)
Watch this
youtu.be/gwtzboIq50A
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:42, Reply)
I had to turn it off NOW because I am offended by adult humour

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:44, Reply)
creepy people

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:51, Reply)
oh god this is making me sad

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:55, Reply)
I had to turn it off almost instantly because his voice made me feel sick

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:55, Reply)
He once claimed to have eaten breakfast with Jimi Hendrix lol

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:07, Reply)
Seriously?
I mean...seriously?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:15, Reply)
Yep
In the same post he said 'I drive a fast car and get all the sex I want', it was brilliant. He bragged about going out with a model.

Turns out she was a hand model, with a face like a bag of spanners. He's in a Pink Floyd tribute band.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:20, Reply)
I didn't watch much of the comedy set, but why is he dressed like a homeless man?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:23, Reply)
Hendrix's last words were 'Hood-Butter...dress like a cunt....'

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:38, Reply)
seriously
www.b3ta.com/search/talk?q=breakfast+hendrix
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:20, Reply)
'100% fact'

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:23, Reply)
is there a chance that there's a tiny grain of truth in the tale?
like "I went backstage at the festival and was allowed to eat one of the leftover buffet sandwiches after Jimi Hendrix and his crew had breakfasted"?

I'm just trying to work out how you develop such a chinny-reckon of a tale; it couldn't have come from nothing.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:25, Reply)
'I went to the Isle of Wight on holiday with my paedo uncle, we had breakfast.
There was once a festival on the Isle of Wight. Jimi Hendrix played at it'
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:29, Reply)
Jimi hendrix burnt his guitar's neck. I didn't like it.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:31, Reply)
You underestimate the sort of things people lie about to impress others.
Probably once met someone who actually did have breakfast with Jimmy, decided it was a cool story and now retwlls it as himself to impress all the girls he sleeps with.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:30, Reply)
ok

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:31, Reply)
Just to play devil's advocate
maybe, just maybe he might be telling the truth? I mean, you never know.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:38, Reply)
no m8

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:39, Reply)
I try to see the best in people

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:41, Reply)
+r +a

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:48, Reply)
this is also true

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:00, Reply)
He was ex sas/sbs, he wouldn't lie

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:41, Reply)
oh, well I stand corrected

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:42, Reply)
He was a bellend

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:44, Reply)
You won't be invited to his b4shorzs with that attitude

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:51, Reply)
i suppose
he did used to lie an awful lot though. this was back before qotw was the established location for that
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:47, Reply)
What other things did he lie about?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:00, Reply)
there was a lot of the 'model' type stuff that mcbeef mentioned and he was always bragging about his success etc
i don't remember specifics but he got called out on it a fair bit
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:28, Reply)
there's a fair few claims here:
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post543641
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:33, Reply)
Ooh what did he have?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:20, Reply)
Jimmy Hill on toast

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:20, Reply)
crosstown traffic jam?
no that's terrible
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:39, Reply)
voodoo chilli

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:41, Reply)
didn't seem like a breakfast food, but these crazy popstars eh?
who knows what kind of shenanigans they get up to
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:48, Reply)
No wonder they die young eating like that for breakfast

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:01, Reply)
The Wind Cries Dairy?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:41, Reply)
in your house, i'm not surprised

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:51, Reply)
Like A Rolling Stone-baked Pizza

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:52, Reply)
All Along the Zinger Tower

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:53, Reply)
my heart's not in it

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:55, Reply)
the original Bill Hicks

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:56, Reply)
I haven't watched this,
but I'm still going to say "Awooga, what a rush."
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:57, Reply)
You hit the nail on the head, m8

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:02, Reply)
That man is the biggest prick in the entire history of b3ta and I don't say that lightly

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:06, Reply)
oh come on, windy's not that bad
haha misunderstandings!
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:13, Reply)
yes he is

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:27, Reply)
You terrible troll

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:55, Reply)
Sefton: sunny
Chance of getting off the couch within the next hour: 100%
Likelihood of soup: 100%
Level of fucks given: 0%
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:41, Reply)
willy
willy
bum
bum
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:52, Reply)

GL3 here
Weather: dunno, frosted windows innit
Interest in work: 15%
Time until hometime: 9 hours
Laziness: 51%
Eating: nothing for 2 days, waiting until I don't feel sick any more
Greediness: 0%
Same shit different dayness: 10%, today seems particularly bad
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:10, Reply)

morbotron.com/video/S05E02/WBOD41wP3_kVO0CzNs0g7ZQeaQ0=.gif
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:14, Reply)

?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:16, Reply)
nice, looks mint

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:31, Reply)
someone's parked outside my flat in some sort of sports edition Multipla.
Sport. Multipla.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:34, Reply)
Like homers car, manolith show us

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:49, Reply)
oooh, can doooo
frinkiac.com/video/S02E15/TMXzVHjDqaeABybobr_1nzEJVdg=.gif
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:55, Reply)
Thanks unkie herb

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:58, Reply)
:)

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:29, Reply)

wrensnest.org/blog/wp-content/dolemite-remake.jpg
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:34, Reply)
is that the movie ODB used in his music video?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:36, Reply)
I've not seen the video to which you refer, I'm afraid.
I did however once see Rudy Ray Moore live, he was performing what I can only really describe as 'comedy pimp poetry', it was a great deal better than it sounds.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:11, Reply)
Is you or isn't you a wordy fuck?
Well?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:39, Reply)
This should be a new thread

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:43, Reply)
It is fine, you can just write willy on this and be done with it

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:49, Reply)
lol
willy-on
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:17, Reply)
I got an A grade
this site's better for measuring your vocab level beyond a silly guardian test though.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:45, Reply)
I got 6

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:47, Reply)
me too!

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 11:51, Reply)
oh wait, i got 6 in the guardian one
i guess my reading comprehension is pretty bad if i couldn't figure this post out
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:02, Reply)
8/10

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:17, Reply)
You fucking dunce
Well done!
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:25, Reply)
10/10 woo!

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:17, Reply)
Congratulations
You wordy fuck!
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:22, Reply)
Thx bbz
Had a bit of help from my knowledge of French for 'chatoyancy'.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:27, Reply)
Ah yes
Knowing how well your house floats is a very French thing to care about.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:28, Reply)
9/11

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:22, Reply)
jew

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:24, Reply)
Word fuel can't melt grammatical beams

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:24, Reply)
7

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:24, Reply)
McBeef and Ragnarok are better than you
So don't ever forget it.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 12:26, Reply)
ningles

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:28, Reply)
just did a bit of sick in my mouth

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:28, Reply)

s d
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:00, Reply)
just the tip, that's the least gay bit

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:11, Reply)
Shut up.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:29, Reply)
I deserve that

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:34, Reply)
Ningdongdoodles

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:33, Reply)
the witch is dead

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:34, Reply)
Glomps

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:34, Reply)
I've put the internet kettle on, fancy a cuppa?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:35, Reply)
Cor do I , I'll get the baconz nommies

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:41, Reply)
I would like 3 baconz pls

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:44, Reply)
On for teh kitteh

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:04, Reply)

b3ta.com/talk/6429293
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:32, Reply)
as true today as it was then

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:35, Reply)
this whole thread has made me feel disgusted with myself

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:39, Reply)
yet still the mongys do nothing

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:14, Reply)
WANKER

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:34, Reply)
^ upset

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:35, Reply)
Well retro m8

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:49, Reply)
I'm reminding everyone of just how awful this place used to be

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:54, Reply)
Spang!

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:56, Reply)
lovelyping

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:07, Reply)
morning, t3h Trouser

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:52, Reply)
you can call me Steve Pantaloons
*Chevy Chase playing invisible trumpet*
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:55, Reply)
Nongles

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:55, Reply)
this reply is aces

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 7:55, Reply)
I'm very unwell. Been vomiting for 2 days and getting terrible headaches. I think I've caught my wife's morning sickness :(

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:07, Reply)
you have elephantiasis

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:10, Reply)
This is why I'm the doctor and you are whatever you are.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:31, Reply)
love and fluffles

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:13, Reply)
thanks grrry

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:31, Reply)
this ftw

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:14, Reply)
prick

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:31, Reply)
Oh noes

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:21, Reply)
sad toimes

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:32, Reply)
get some nommy amoxisillys

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:38, Reply)
great idea mongy, amoxisillys make everything better

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:43, Reply)
Good.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:22, Reply)
wanker

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:32, Reply)
You should probably go and wait for ages to speak to a disinterested overpaid person about that

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:25, Reply)
It's alright, I can just whinge at my patients.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:30, Reply)
Now I'm no expert,
but it sounds to me like you've overindulged in taking it up the bum from other gay spazzes.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:41, Reply)
Maybe it's YOU who is pregnant
did you think of that?
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:56, Reply)
2 can is a seahorse, confirmed

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:57, Reply)

s personalit
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:01, Reply)
Can u get pregante?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:58, Reply)
You have died of dysentry.

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
I can haz morning?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:11, Reply)
Pull up a cat, shop a chair LOL

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:15, Reply)
you'll never leave! Until you get banned

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:01, Reply)
Alright

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:23, Reply)
Welcome to our little corner of teh interwebz!

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:29, Reply)
Nah its just the way these trousers hang

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:26, Reply)
*huggles*

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:32, Reply)
this is low, even for you

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:49, Reply)
bear in mind mano, this sort of shit was once commonplace

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:51, Reply)
yeah, and these things can stay in the past
what else do you want to bring back? hitler? slavery? dial-up internet?!
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:58, Reply)
Grange Hill?
GOOD TOIMES!
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:12, Reply)
*steals your sausage*

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:12, Reply)
Row
land
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:28, Reply)
just say no

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:18, Reply)
you were much better when you were RHCPaul
HC u
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:12, Reply)
sashay away, m8t

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:17, Reply)

media.tenor.com/images/68510afd3f2d06d51062d3fdfabfa2fa/tenor.gif
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:22, Reply)
ham toucher

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 8:55, Reply)
like you've ever seen a ladygarden

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:10, Reply)
or growler as we call it round these parts

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:12, Reply)
last

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:08, Reply)
Have a big *hug* and a *biscuit*

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:11, Reply)
oh shit

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:13, Reply)
yeah

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:19, Reply)
might as well close the site down, guys
tangles has fucked it
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:24, Reply)
soz everyone

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:27, Reply)
what are you like, eh?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:33, Reply)

giphy.com/gifs/90s-burn-your-life-down-bwitched-pCsNbFNfXZ4yc/fullscreen
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:38, Reply)
no YOU bum YOUR life down

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
hullo

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:12, Reply)
*jiggles moobs*

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:13, Reply)
How was your trip, Tangled?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:22, Reply)
Holiday, woohoo!
Wife is getting stressed, probably because I rival my children in the "being useless" stakes.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:37, Reply)
I dated a girl whose dad made scale model tiles of his suitcases
and a map of the car boot, and spent the evening prior to departure test-fitting it all on the dining table for space optimization.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:40, Reply)
wow, what a prick

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:52, Reply)
He was an absolute pillock
His daughter grew up to be a bit of a dinlow too
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:00, Reply)
actually, that's not fair
His daughter was the textbook example of middle-class-teen-rebellion-maturing-into-middle-class-drone. Sigur Ros as she walked down the church aisle ffs.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:01, Reply)
*belms*

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:14, Reply)
very much so
she's since divorced, but since she married a bloke she works with, in a government agency no less, she's basically doomed to keep seeing him every day until they both retire 30 years for now. It's like the backstory for the most tedious BBC sitcom imaginable.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:20, Reply)
you seem to have followed her life quite closely

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:22, Reply)
^

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:25, Reply)
I grew up on an island, everyone knows everyone
she's best mates with my cousin, her other mutual friend is the daughter of my dad's next door neighbour, we all went to the same school, drank in the same pubs etc etc blah blah.
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:29, Reply)
Simon Lotion?

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:19, Reply)
Dibnah

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 9:48, Reply)
take it easy, man

(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:11, Reply)
I'm cool, I'm cool
No one needs to get hurt
(, Thu 17 Aug 2017, 10:22, Reply)

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