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NEWSLETTER: ISSUE 121: "YOU SAY POTATO, WE SAY POTOOTEE"

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This Week:
* ANIM - I say potato
* WEEBL - On the fucking moon
* B3TA PARTY - next week

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________  ____ __  ___
____/  _)|_  // /_/ _ |      
___/  _ |/_ </ __/ __ |      "We're saving the
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_|       web... together"

B3ta email 121 - 06 Feb 2004

Read this issue in your browser:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue121/

       Subscribe:  b3ta-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
         Unsub:  b3ta-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
  
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: B3TA PARTY
  Next week. Will rock.

  Listen up, spazzers. We're having a party next
  Friday and you're invited. It's going to be
  amazing. Best of all we've got a raffle in 
  which you can win all sorts of prizes. We've
  also got a few t-shirts for sale. Huzzah.
http://www2.b3ta.com/party/valentine.gif


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: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK 
  Small Faces, BBC, Dwarfs, Fridge, Veitch, Weebl

  >> Lazy Sunday <<
  Skipper is clearly a new talent to watch. He's
  taken the Small Faces classic "Lazy Sunday"
  and made an utterly charming video featuring
  a strange potato character. He writes, "Hope it
  brings you as much joy as it has me." 
http://pommedeterre.ednetuk.com/


  >> Brian for the Beeb <<
  "My dad Brian", writes Monkeymanblue, "has
  decided to put himself forward for the position
  Director General of the BBC. Not only does he
  promise to 'cut the crap' - he also plans to
  'slash the shit', 'waste the wank', and 'beat the 
  bollocks'" Newspapers: looking for a different
  angle on the Hutton Inquiry? Try this.
http://www.brian4thebeeb.com/


  >> Fucking dwarf <<
  CCC is a b3ta legend. He's the famous Monkey
  Man of Tunbridge Wells. He's also a rather
  talented songwriter who records under the
  name Giovanni & Sebastian and caused us
  to get an official complaint when we
  played his song on b3ta radio. Wheatox has
  made him a rather energetic flash video.
  Watch and listen. This song is comic genius.
http://www.mrandmrswheatley.co.uk/isay.html


  >> Fridge tip works! <<
  Each newsletter we stick a tip at the bottom,
  to share our knowledge and help make your
  life a little bit easier. We love it when you
  try them out and write it up for the web.
  Thanks Trumpet.
http://www.kitallen.com/fridge


  >> Rathergood on biscuits <<
  Before Joel Veitch became the internet
  superstar he is today he was Australia's
  leading poet. Now? He's set some of his old
  work to music. Oh, and he's robbed a bit
  of Weebl's visual style too. Weebl says,
  "Twunt. This means war." So look out for his
  revenge. It could be epic - a clash of
  the web titans kinda thing.
http://www.rathergood.com/biscuits/


  >> Weebl & Bob: On the moon <<
  Speaking of Weebl, he's off in Boston doing
  some gay chat about web comics at MIT. Anyway,
  he's left us with a new episode of his
  eponymous cartoon. This one has rockets.
http://www.weebl.jolt.co.uk/moon.htm


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: B3TA RADIO
  Slang Survey

  This week we asked you about new language
  that's been amusing or annoying you.
http://b3ta.com/questions/slangsurvey/

  You can learn more about b3ta radio and how
  to tune via your radio or the web here:
http://b3ta.com/features/b3taradio/


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: SITES IN BRIEF 
  Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates.

  >> Pipe-smoke-eye man <<
  Pussy Shoot Ping-Pong Ball? Pussy smoke
  cigarette? We've all been there. But check
  this man-whore's web-advert for his services:
  eyeball smoke pipe.
http://www.thephilipsphile.com/ripvid/v-eye-smoker.swf


  >> Rainbow smut-fest <<
  Finally, the long-rumoured tape of the UK kids'
  show Rainbow, where the script writers
  made every line a blatant sexual innuendo
  has found its way onto the web. Warning:
  16MB download but worth seeing. 
http://www.wow.f2s.com/humour/rainbow.mpg


  >> Modern estate-agent marketing <<
  As if estate agents weren't bad enough already,
  they've got hip to this viral marketing
  malarkey and started writing copy designed
  to make people pass it on and go "fuck me
  - is this real?" Bunch of cunts.
http://www.ralphbending.com/sales_page.asp


  >> I failed my exams <<
  Ever sat in an exam and felt like writing
  stupid answers to take the piss? This bloke
  did. Read his paper. If b3ta ran universities
  he'd get a first.
http://www.enzine.net/index.php?id=8c9d72da50


  >> Animal Yawns <<
  Poor little creatures, it gets tiring being
  cute all day. Check this collection of animals
  preparing to get some shut-eye.
http://www.animalyawns.com/


  >> Don't spit, swallow <<
  Men! Fed up with your ladies gobbling your
  old man and spitting the gunk up your leg?
  Forward them this link and let them see the
  error of their ways. Warning: she'll dump you.
http://www.dontspitswallow.com/


  >> Fox cock knocks Beeb shock <<
  Still hungry for more Hutton links? This
  Fox news coverage of the affair is frankly
  mind boggling. Hooray for Rupert Murdoch.
http://blugg.com/stuff/foxs_view_of_the_bbc_player.htm


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: THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO AAHH
  When foxes and badgers make friends

  Paul McCartney! Looking for a metaphor for
  racial harmony to write a saccharine duet
  about? Why not try this true story of a
  poor orphan fox and badger who made friends
  in the rain. Sweet.
http://www.hydestile.org.uk/PAGES/Badger%20&%20Foxcub.html

  BTW: What's the cutest thing you've seen on
  the web recently? Tell us at http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/

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: B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE
  Results from the Daily Mail World Challenge

  Each week we run a competition to test your
  creative skills. We set a challenge and you
  open Photoshop and mess with our heads.

  Last week we wanted an insight into Daily Mail
  World, and you scared us silly:
http://b3ta.com/challenge/dailymailworld/

  We asked b3ta boarder 'rogan' to judge the
  entries - here are his 3 faves.

  Rogan writes -

  #1 "Daily Mail map of the World - I bet they'll
     be giving these maps away in primary schools.
     On the plus side, the people of Ireland will
     enjoy their new tropical location. (monkeon)
http://b3ta.com/board/2706952

  #2 "Euro Tunnel - Problem solved! But with no
     immigrants to write about wouldn't the Mail go
     out of business? - yay, another problem solved!
     (Slim)
http://b3ta.com/board/2695585

  #3 "Daily Mailopoly! - Just right for the challenge,
     if the Daily Mail ran the world this is exactly
     what it would be like..." (doctorwhen)
http://b3ta.com/board/2700954


  >> This Week's Challenge <<

  This week, the challenge dictator put on his
  pop-svengali hat and gave us the suggestion,
  "Disappointing Tribute Bands".
http://b3ta.com/challenge/tributebands/


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: WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
  Follow-ups on previous stories.

  * B3TA IN THE TIMES - UK broadsheet has written
    up a more-informed-than-usual article about
    b3ta and its friends. Huzzah.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/printFriendly/0,,1-8088-983341,00.html


  * RATHERGOOD SANDWICH AD - yay for Joel and
    his ad millions. But please stop sending
    us the link going, "Oh no! He's been ripped
    off." 


  * HUTTON PIC - MissPrism made an image which
    escaped from our board and into the wild.
    Used by several newspapers, such as the
    Sunday Express, who -surprise surprise- didn't
    credit the artist.
http://b3ta.com/board/2688682


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: STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE

  Make something cool and tell us about it. If
  you are in it then people will see your stuff.

  Things we'd really like to see include

  * VALENTINE STUFF - that doesn't make us vomit

  * THINGS FOR OUR RAFFLE - pep@b3ta.com
    is the lady you need to talk to. There will
    be a linky credit fest in next week's issue.

  * "BUMSEXUAL" USED IN A NEWSPAPER - are you
    a sub-editor for a national? Slip it in and
    send us a scan. Cheers.

  Send contributions to http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/

  BTW: If you've sent something in that hasn't
  been featured then don't be put off - we look
  at everything you send us.


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  THANKS: 

  This issue was edited by Rob Manuel with 
  David Stevenson.
  Links sent in by Bovine, mooskleo,
  Matthew Bowler, boomerang_robert, Whiffert,
  Blugg & freshlegs
  Top Tippery by Slocombe.
  Additional linkage by Fraser Lewry.
  Board research by Fnord.
  Image challenge handled by Mike Trinder.
  Proofing by the lady b4ta norks. (73645)

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  TOP TIP:
  Smearing peanut butter on pills makes it much
  easier for dogs to eat their tablets.

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